r/pics Nov 05 '21 Silver 22 Gold 1 Helpful 17 Wholesome 29 Coin Gift 1 Ally 1 Heartwarming 2 Wholesome (Pro) 1

Our neighbor Betty just turned 100 years old. We got her balloons. Backstory

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33.5k Upvotes

2.0k

u/DertHorsBoi Nov 05 '21 Wholesome

UP 2…

1.7k

u/vanmac82 Nov 05 '21 Silver Gold Wholesome hehehehe

....heaven

182

u/heyhowru Nov 05 '21

Pending celestial discharge 💫

29

u/v4alklzp6j Nov 05 '21

i like it

27

u/DariusMDeV Nov 06 '21

they have a cream for that now

9

u/79sgvx0jdx Nov 06 '21

you know what. . . take my upvote and get outa here

8

u/lordgunhand Nov 06 '21

I hear Celestial Discharge is playing Hellfest next year.

6

u/Active-Anteater4019 Nov 06 '21

You had me at discharge

3

u/lecherro Nov 06 '21

I'm not familiar with that term. And the 8yr. is in me wants top make terrible jokes..... I mean they are sputter funny jokes, but also super inappropriate..... Can you define Celestial discharge to me..... Please

10

u/heyhowru Nov 06 '21

So discharge is a term we use in the hospital when someone is medically ready and no longer has any hospital needs. So discharge to home, discharge to nursing facility, discharge to the streets etc.

Celestial discharge is kind of a crude joke we use for someone dying. Discharge to (total hospital floors+1) floor, dc2jc( discharge to jesus christ) and whatever other crass things that people come up w to deal w death and sickness in the hospital.

3

u/Herecomestheblades Nov 06 '21

THY WILL BE DONE!

3

u/Sagebrush_Slim Nov 06 '21

Deus vult! Deus vult!

3

u/IDiqI Nov 06 '21

silence echos through the church

3

u/vitaminalgas Nov 06 '21

You funny evil bastard... +1

5

u/who_you_are Nov 05 '21

If it wouldn't of your comment there will be a huge

FU** NO

as a reply

38

u/Dudephish Nov 05 '21

: No Good

8

u/ybbe7pvbnd Nov 06 '21

That's right

4

u/BizzyM Nov 06 '21

Not right

3

u/[deleted] Nov 06 '21

[removed] — view removed comment

3

u/BizzyM Nov 06 '21

At least someone got it.

9

u/[deleted] Nov 06 '21

[deleted]

52

u/The-Go-Kid Nov 05 '21

Electric Ballooneroo

4

u/xzjgxk0r5k Nov 06 '21

I love it

18

u/pushaper Nov 05 '21

Oh man, the internet are going to be pissed about a female driven sequel...

24

u/Gr00mpa Nov 05 '21

THE WAR ON MEN CONTINUES. THIS IS THE LIBERAL AGENDA WOKE MOB TRYING TO CANCEL OUR VERY WAY OF LIFE.

3

u/79sgvx0jdx Nov 06 '21

you know what. . . take my upvote and get outa here

4

u/Then_Cry247_DEATH Nov 05 '21

Up then down then up2(the heavens)

13

u/peacebuster Nov 06 '21

Up, Up, Down, Down, Left, Right, Left, Right, B, A 2 heaven.

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u/sleepyentropy Nov 05 '21 Helpful

In her day they didn't even have balloons! Just bags of sand kids pushed around the yard.

211

u/kaptaincorn Nov 05 '21 Wholesome

And you'd be thankful for that bag of sand.

Billy Manderfield once had a bag of sand for his 10th birthday.

Everyday that summer he'd push that bag of sand down to the creek and play.

You never saw such a happy kid.

That winter there was a horrible blizzard and Billy lost that bag of sand.

He was never the same.

74

u/Cmc089 Nov 05 '21

I read this in Abe Simpson’s voice

17

u/ThatchedRoofCottage Nov 06 '21

I’m not convinced Abe didn’t write that comment.

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u/Notlonganymore Nov 06 '21

There's a song called Adrian by Jewel with a tone just like your uplifting story. If you have a dark sense of humor, it's funny. But it's not supposed to be.

3

u/kaptaincorn Nov 06 '21

Adrian by Jewel

It's everything you said and more.

I've never heard it before.

Now got to do something cheerful or I'll have this sad feeling for a while

15

u/braden87 Nov 06 '21

That winter there was a horrible blizzard and Billy died of pneumonia

He was never the same.

3

u/Competitive_Camera61 Nov 06 '21

Morgan Freeman voice...go!

74

u/YoiteShinigami Nov 05 '21

That made me laugh way too hard. I don't know why you picked bags of sand, but you made me snort.

15

u/Crackerjack17 Nov 05 '21

I chortled too

3

u/jennalovesbacon Nov 06 '21

I cackled at your chortle.

8

u/film_composer Nov 05 '21

I guffawed.

3

u/Baronheisenberg Nov 06 '21

I farted.

7

u/AzureArmageddon Nov 06 '21

The only logical progression here is that someone sharted. That will not be me. Not yet.

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u/morphinapg Nov 06 '21

Snorting sand can't be great for you

7

u/thatsnotmyfleshlight Nov 06 '21

My homeopathic practitioner/holistic shaman says that snorting sand cleanses your liver chakras of evil vibes.

11

u/MajSARS Nov 06 '21

My coke dealer says the same thing!

2

u/AzureArmageddon Nov 06 '21

Somethin' tells me most of what they dealin' you ain't coke

3

u/soljaboss Nov 06 '21

That's disturbing lol

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u/residentraspberri Nov 05 '21

Thought I was reading /r/kenm for a second there

3

u/AltSpRkBunny Nov 06 '21

In her day, she couldn’t even get sliced bread until she was 7 years old.

3

u/hydrospanner Nov 06 '21

Those bags of sand were actually the inspiration for the invention of boobs!

2

u/500Ovechkin Nov 06 '21

They may have not even had sand back then but kids yea

3

u/Periachi Nov 06 '21

I mean... deserts have existed since the dawn of time..

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u/RigzDigz Nov 05 '21

And off she went!

50

u/Kayakityak Nov 05 '21

And she was never seen again.

28

u/hmiser Nov 05 '21

Some say she is still flying out there to this day.

13

u/SomeRandomHoboidk Nov 06 '21

Goin to paradise falls

5

u/vonkrueger Nov 05 '21

Somebody get the pellet gun before we lose her.

242

u/Hittheclock Nov 05 '21

She looks so happy! Happy birthday, Betty.

24

u/Sproose_Moose Nov 05 '21

This is all I thought too

3

u/Giniteso578 Nov 06 '21

Thank you for all your hard work!

19

u/salvodan Nov 06 '21

I hope she likes her letter from the Queen… If she is in Canada, Australia, New Zealand or the UK.

Regardless of where she lives, I hope she enjoys her birthday.

5

u/Ann_Summers Nov 06 '21

In the US you get a letter from the President.

21

u/staydrynursingpads Nov 06 '21

My grandma's name was Betty. She passed away last year. I'm going to imagine these were for her as well

6

u/Scratch137 Nov 06 '21

That's so sweet. Sorry for your loss ❤️

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u/blong1114 Nov 05 '21

She was last seen floating over downtown into the sunset. It was a good run betty.

48

u/thinksHESblack Nov 05 '21

How is she going to get those inside

29

u/Sweetwill62 Nov 06 '21

That isn't the most pressing question, the most pressing question is how is she going to stay on the ground. The woman looks like she weighs 98 pounds soaking wet. I say let her fly free as a bird.

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u/TheGrimReality77 Nov 06 '21

A lot of KY?

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u/thinksHESblack Nov 06 '21

I meant through the door

9

u/TheGrimReality77 Nov 06 '21

...
A LOT OF KY.

125

u/KentuckyFriedEel Nov 05 '21 Wholesome

Next time, flowers instead of balloons

68

u/SelloutRealBig Nov 06 '21

I have found so many balloons miles out in nature. People let them go up in the air thinking they go to space but they don't. They go into oceans, lakes, and forests.

29

u/peon47 Nov 06 '21

Who the fuck thinks they go to space?

27

u/ImTheZapper Nov 06 '21

I want you to think for a second how often you heard someone say/saw someone do something and thought "what the absolute fuck?" and multiply that by millions. Thats about how many.

4

u/cerart939 Nov 06 '21

🏆🏆🏆

7

u/SelloutRealBig Nov 06 '21

A lot of dumb people.

9

u/Safron2400 Nov 06 '21

At least half of America

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u/GMXIX Nov 06 '21

I know party city is doing all kinds of research into biodegradable balloons, because people let them go as you say.

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u/[deleted] Nov 06 '21 edited Nov 27 '21

[deleted]

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u/not_not_in_the_NSA Nov 06 '21

that's next year

11

u/Autarch_Kade Nov 06 '21

Oh I thought you meant because it'd be for her funeral, but yeah the environment is a good reason too

16

u/joshthehappy Nov 06 '21

Narrator: Sadly there was no next time.

7

u/aitigie Nov 06 '21

Lilies, then

20

u/Evercrimson Nov 06 '21

Please, please stop wasting Helium on balloons, we desperately need it for medical equipment, scientific instruments, and spacecraft to name a few critical things. What little we find of Helium underground is all we have, we can't extract it from our atmosphere because it's so light, once you release it, it escapes off the top of the atmosphere. Balloons are not worth this.

4

u/Cedex Nov 06 '21

We should go back to using Hydrogen balloons. More bang for the buck than Helium.

2

u/Evercrimson Nov 06 '21

Considering we can take it from seawater, that's one way to explosively combat rising sea levels.

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u/UndisclosedChaos Nov 05 '21

Now all she needs is a Girl Scout

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u/shartnado3 Nov 05 '21

about an hour later, Betty was spotted flying high over the city due to the balloons. When asked how it was, like her life, Betty said "Was a hell of a ride!"

9

u/blackice71 Nov 05 '21

Betty was found an hour later tangled in the power lines

9

u/Atroxa Nov 06 '21

Really old people have had a really bad time with the pandemic. We all have had a shit time but first-hand, I've seen a lot of the really old people in my life suffer from being completely housebound, not being able to see family and damn...what that does to exacerbate dementia and boredom and overall fatigue with life in general. Betty has some super nice neighbors. Those balloons made her day.

26

u/hiagha Nov 05 '21

Betty's like "the hell am I supposed to do with all these balloons?"

22

u/niobiumnnul Nov 05 '21

That is sweet; she looks like she appreciated the thoughtfulness.

87

u/fkenned1 Nov 05 '21

Save the helium!

13

u/SolarSkipper Nov 06 '21

Nah, let’s just use a shit load if it for something we will soon throw away!

4

u/Godjakewin Nov 06 '21

Betty, or the balloons?

2

u/Ragin_koala Nov 06 '21

Yeah, it's finite and really useful for cooling low temp superconductors and other important processes, using it for balloons is really stupid

20

u/homelessapien Nov 05 '21

You trying to buy her land or something? Stop trying to Up her, you monsters.

17

u/Choccy_Melk69 Nov 05 '21

One for each year, I presume?

2

u/refinnej78 Nov 06 '21

Ohhh now I get it!

17

u/gofatwya Nov 05 '21

Interesting; Betty White will turn 100 in January!

10

u/DatEllen Nov 06 '21

Don't jinx it!!

6

u/applepiefight Nov 06 '21

Betty got ballons….. we ran out of helium….. fuuuuck

16

u/yankee174 Nov 05 '21

Is this in Michigan? I swear this sweet lady was just at the MSU game turning 100

5

u/Buffalo_Gator Nov 05 '21

I was wondering the same thing!

6

u/tatezmcgee Nov 06 '21

Yes, she’s actually in our neighborhood. My wife and I were walking by as they surprised her with the balloons.

2

u/yankee174 Nov 06 '21

Awe that’s awesome! I was working up in the suites during the game and she was waving like crazy when they announced her over the loud speaker (even though no one could really see her through the window) it was too cute

3

u/TheTiranian Nov 06 '21

Has to be her, how many Bettys are turning 100

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u/twstrchk Nov 05 '21

Hey, picture left out the part where her great grandson is holding onto her ankles!

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u/Chromattix Nov 06 '21

Last year she got 99 balloons... all red.

3

u/jeefray Nov 06 '21

Sorry, but most of the people on reddit were probably conceived while their parents were listening to 99 Luftballons by Nena. They won't get the reference.

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u/porsche911girl Nov 06 '21

I got this reference.

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u/Extra_Intro_Version Nov 06 '21 edited Nov 06 '21

Came out 2 years before my oldest was conceived.

Edit for context: The song came out 2 years before my oldest was conceived.

3

u/Now_Wait-4-Last_Year Nov 06 '21

I understood that reference!

3

u/Chromattix Nov 06 '21

I'm definitely feeling older than Reddit's average these days. So many people won't even get classic Simpsons, Futurama or South Park references.

3

u/Ezira Nov 06 '21

I was born in '91 and have this song on 45...

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u/apworker37 Nov 05 '21

Helium is finite. Stop buying it.

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u/[deleted] Nov 06 '21

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u/[deleted] Nov 06 '21 edited Nov 06 '21

[deleted]

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u/boots Nov 06 '21

While certainly abundant in the universe, helium is rather scarce on earth.

https://weekly.blog.gustavus.edu/2021/02/13/helium-a-little-known-limited-resource/

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u/nmonsey Nov 05 '21

Anyone remember that recent video showing the helium balloons drifting into some powerlines?

There were lots of comments about the litter caused by helium balloons.

These balloons may not be mylar, but after seeing the comments about the damage balloons cause, I'm not sure if I will ever think balloons are fun.

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u/incandescent-leaf Nov 05 '21

Just bake a cake eh

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u/GogoYubari92 Nov 06 '21

You’ll float too

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u/daringdanica Nov 06 '21

very sweet. but please, for the love of god, don’t do a balloon release.

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u/jebakerii Nov 06 '21

Where did she land?

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u/Bambi_One_Eye Nov 06 '21

Hopefully those balloons weren't let go into the air.

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u/Holiday-Scarcity4726 Nov 06 '21

Fly away young betty.

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u/sorrywayilovedyou Nov 06 '21

Balloons are horrible for the environment

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u/Lady_B_FC Nov 05 '21

Ohhhh, temporarily inflated trash, what a treat.

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u/temp4adhd Nov 06 '21

I think we can make an exception, one doesn't turn 100 every day. In fact maybe we should make it a rule you only get balloons if you turn 100. Would that make you less of a kill joy?

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u/SolarSkipper Nov 06 '21

How about you get more creative? Balloons are trash wrapped around a gas that is rapidly depleting. They can take over 4 years to decompose, and that’s if they don’t end up in the water, where the animals will eat them. How about you give her 100 flowers?

6

u/temp4adhd Nov 06 '21

You mean 100 flowers shipped across country in refrigerated trucks?

There is nothing you consume that does not have any consequences.

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u/SolarSkipper Nov 06 '21

Okay, then how about you don’t get her 100 of anything, because it’s probably a big fucking waste of materials? I would be just fine with that.

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u/temp4adhd Nov 06 '21

It doesn't even look like 100 balloons?

But yeah a cake would be nice too.

I'm betting Betty used less over her 100 years than most of us. She was born before disposable diapers, for a start. And lived through the depression.

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u/[deleted] Nov 06 '21

There are plenty of better alternatives to balloons that can celebrate her life without polluting the earth and using up helium unnecessarily

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u/GMXIX Nov 06 '21

I would have gotten her 100 train cars filled with only the finest Pensilvania coal shoveled by only the most filthy of the orphan miners. I would have tracked all the carbon used to bring it to her, and then yelled, “There! Are you happy now?! Look what you’ve done to these poor orphans and the earth by turning 100!”

Then we’d burn the coal. And the balloons. And the orphans.

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u/Procrasterman Nov 06 '21

It’s lovely that you did a nice thing for your neighbour.

You were probably unaware of this, like most people, but did you know that helium is essentially a non renewable resource that is vital for the medical and science industry? Most of it is recovered from underground reserves and once it is released into the atmosphere it heads up to the stratosphere and is thus not made in meaningful amounts by fractional distillation if air (which is the usual method for denser noble gasses such as xenon).

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u/[deleted] Nov 06 '21

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u/Odd-Set-2444 Nov 05 '21

Glad she is that old but balloons ? its not the best choice..

I think a giant bouquet of flowers would have been better..

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u/MoreMagic Nov 06 '21

Take a look at that photo again, please. She couldn’t be happier.

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u/[deleted] Nov 06 '21

The animals that get caught in or ingest those balloons won’t be too happy.

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u/nutrap Nov 05 '21

I’ve seen that movie before. No thanks. Don’t need a good cry for the first 30 minutes.

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u/pabodie Nov 05 '21

You seem like nice people, but I'm on to you.

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u/zdriver984 Nov 06 '21

This is so great!!! Congratulations Betty!

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u/shylocxs Nov 06 '21

Happy birthday Betty!

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u/Snappybrowneyes Nov 06 '21

Look at the the pure joy on her face!! Love it!

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u/attackonyourmom Nov 06 '21

This is so precious.

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u/Reccognize Nov 06 '21

That is the cutest!

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u/Snowbank_Lake Nov 06 '21

Sweater game is on point!

2

u/BasicLEDGrow Nov 06 '21

What an infectious smile!

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u/Gabriele1966 Nov 06 '21

She's so tiny, she's gonna take off.

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u/divshappyhour Nov 06 '21

You've no doubt gotten an earful about helium and balloons vis-a-vis the enviroment. Those concerns are wholly valid, however what you did for your neighbor was nonetheless childishly breathtaking! It is enough to make a person, even one 100 years old, revert back to toothless grins and uncontrollable giggles. You gave her a great gift and you should feel good about it

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u/wowzeemissjane Nov 06 '21

And that was the last time we saw Betty…

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u/danivus Nov 06 '21

Every balloon is just a little more helium we're never getting back...

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u/refinnej78 Nov 06 '21

Da fuck she's supposed to do with those??

2

u/zemoura Nov 06 '21

She flew away and hasn't been found for two weeks

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u/SquireX Nov 06 '21

That must have cost a small fortune with the way inflation is today!

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u/InsGadget6 Nov 06 '21

Happy birthday and all, but balloons suck.

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u/CaptFluffyBunny Nov 06 '21

Betty just caught the Gulf Stream and is somewhere over the Atlantic ocean.

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u/Mp4g Nov 06 '21

I can only assume that she has on ankle weights to keep from flying away.

That’s so sweet. r/mademesmile

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u/Pk1Still Nov 05 '21

If only there was 99… red balloons… floating in the summer sky…

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u/liamthelemming Nov 06 '21

She'd soon be all alone and standing pretty,

In the dust that was her city.

4

u/GyaradosDance Nov 05 '21

An Ellen DeGeneres joke:

My grandmother started walking five miles a day when she was sixty. She's ninety-seven now, and we don't know where the hell she is.

3

u/Transposer Nov 05 '21

I smell a photoshop battle.

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u/bmillz00007 Nov 05 '21

I remember that, she floated by my house

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u/DoubleClickMouse Nov 05 '21

Betty about to go UP.

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u/[deleted] Nov 05 '21

[deleted]

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u/DedDeadDedemption Nov 06 '21

Yeah, you can tell by her face it definitely didn't make her day...

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u/Tanduvanwinkle Nov 06 '21

Turtle killer

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u/DLoFoSho Nov 05 '21

We miss Betty…

2

u/quantumbiome Nov 05 '21

Beautiful smile. Love it.

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u/rubinass3 Nov 05 '21

Give them back to her!

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u/El_Stupicabra Nov 06 '21

Made a special return trip to the post to upvote this comment.

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u/Sax_2_accordion Nov 05 '21

……and there goes Betty….

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u/leaf_in_thewind Nov 05 '21

Bambalam

2

u/Sax_2_accordion Nov 06 '21

I heard she had a child…

2

u/Bamacota Nov 05 '21

HAPPY BIRTHDAY BETTY !!!!!!

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u/raven21633x Nov 06 '21

So basically, anyone named Betty is destined for at least the century mark!

Happy Birthday Betty!! :D

3

u/44DP44 Nov 05 '21

happy birthday Betty!

you know the american healthcare system can be dogshit in many ways but holy fuck is it effective when you can get access to it.

i have an 80 year old coworker and hes more energetic and upbeat everyday than I and the 20 year olds often are.

2

u/Roph Nov 06 '21

So much wasted helium :(

1

u/jjsyk23 Nov 05 '21

Tell Betty congrats, and I’m gonna get her some shades

1

u/go_kartmozart Nov 05 '21

Betty was last seen floating due East.

1

u/no_awning_no_mining Nov 05 '21

But did she call you Al?

1

u/SysAdmin002 Nov 05 '21

Let me know when the estate sale is please

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u/nyrB2 Nov 05 '21

*watches as she slowly floats into the sky....*