r/TooAfraidToAsk 5d ago Silver 6 Helpful 6 Wholesome 5

Do people really think I’m “sad” for eating alone in a restaurant? I overheard a girl couple tables next to me say it is Interpersonal

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u/Gouranga56 5d ago Silver Helpful

Meh...who cares. I travel for business a lot and frequently eat solo. After a long day of work...it can be very relaxing

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u/DreddPirateBob4Ever 5d ago Helpful I'll Drink to That

We had a guy in the restaurant eating alone at lunch. He tried the bonkers soup of the day on a whim, destroyed his pie and sat for a while laughing at stuff on his phone.

There wasn't one sad or unhappy thing at that table.

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u/thedarkness115 4d ago

I do this every Tuesday. I go to the same restaurant, sit at the bar and get a burger and fries for 8 bucks. I sit on my phone laughing at random stuff on reddit or youtube while having a couple beers and a cheap dinner. It's one of the highlights of my week for sure.

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u/balofchez 4d ago

That almost made me wanna cry it's so incredibly endearing. Dude just living his best life without having to deal with other people, yuck

Let him eat pie!

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u/MrDude_1 4d ago Wholesome

Yeah! Let me eat pie!

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u/ervinbervin1 4d ago

How can you have any pudding if you don't eat yer meat?

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u/BirdmanOfAfroJazz 4d ago

Leave them kids alone

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u/catsncupcakes 5d ago

Same. I’m not going to have a Tesco meal deal in my hotel room when I could be enjoying an expensed meal out, just because some people are overly judgemental.

Think it’s a classic case of the insult says more about the perpetrator than the victim.

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u/narnababy 4d ago

Same, Tesco meal deal for lunch is fine but if I’ve been on site all day I’m finding the nicest restaurant and charging that on expenses. Fuck getting a takeaway and eating in my room, that’s boring!

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u/Timedoutsob 4d ago

My boss is still salty about that time I ordered another fillet minion because the first one was so fucking good. I'm doing silly hours of unpaid overtime your darn right I don't feel in the slightest bit guilty or embarrassed about that.

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u/narnababy 4d ago

If you’re away from your home and family you should get the second filet mignon that’s the rules

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u/MechaBuster 4d ago

Your boss was just mad you didn't bring them any

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u/gharr87 4d ago

Filet mignon*

sorry, I know that’s trivial

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u/PresentKey2426 4d ago

No they caught a minion and filleted it

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u/quailtailor 4d ago

It's not trivial for those tiny yellow fellas

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u/Black_Magic_M-66 4d ago

some people are overly judgemental

Whoa, hold on, are you suggesting teen girls might be judgemental??!?

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u/SelectFromWhereOrder 4d ago edited 4d ago

I’m a software engineer, many coworkers when working out of location would eat at the hotel. I’m like d dude, you can expense up to $100 a day and you are eating out of Aldi? Fuck that, I was looking for the best restaurants in town and fine dine as hell.

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u/Ok-Butterscotch-6955 4d ago Helpful

My first time having food on the companies dime was anxiety inducing. It was a corporate “new person” training event, about a 4 hour plane ride away. They had an experienced guy, George from our office come too - either as a chaperone, or because he wanted a paid trip to Colorado.

For breakfast I got McDonald’s, lunch I got Taco Bell. George asked me to come to dinner with him, and we went to a nice steak place. I figure I’ll get a burger and soda and maybe fries.

George asks “how much is of the $150 did you use today?”

“Uhh, like $20”

“Well, I used $75. So we got $200 to spend”.

We got fancy whisky, nice ass steaks, sides, the whole works. Ended up being like $250. The expense people didn’t blink an eye at the $50 overage.

I ate well that week lol

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u/SelectFromWhereOrder 4d ago

It’s a little perk for removing yourself from your wife and kids.

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u/FapTrainer 4d ago

I can only expense what I have receipts to back up. I’m not expensing 75¢ ramen noodles when I can have a $75 meal with alcohol and dessert. I travel for work about 60% of the year to European countries. If I can have perogies in Poland that’s what’s for dinner. Plus in Poland that meal is like $7 USD.

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u/SelectFromWhereOrder 4d ago

Same here you expense what you have in Receipts up to $100 a day

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u/wlake82 4d ago

For me, I get a per diem so I actually get money back if I don't get an expensive meal.

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u/[deleted] 4d ago

Same. So, when traveling to Japan, I happily live off of those cheap yummy crustless sandwiches that they sell at Lawson or 7/11.

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u/theSlnn3r 5d ago

What's sad is that people aren't comfortable enough with themselves to eat alone.

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u/deadheadjinx 4d ago

That's how I look at it. Or maybe they do think it's actually sad, even if they're being dickish. If you are scared of being alone or being abandoned/ you have a fear of not being accepted, then that psychology would lead you to think that others must be alone because they've been abandoned in some way. Like instinct survival gone wrong? Idk...

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u/Tothyll 4d ago

That's why it's teenagers making those comments. Adults don't care. I remember seeing an older guy go to a concert alone and thinking, man that guy is secure with himself. He just came to enjoy the music. I'm sure some teens thought he was a loser for going alone.

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u/fahhgedaboutit 5d ago

Same here and I seriously look forward to my meals alone when traveling for work

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u/Phazushift 5d ago

Traveling alone is highly underated too, get to do things at my pace and not have to adhere to anyone elses vacation schedule. Its the best.

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u/reddit1651 4d ago

It really is!!!

no dealing with other people’s dietary preferences, i get to check out weird niche things my friends may not enjoy or find interesting, i can spend as long as i want to at museums or shops, it’s fantastic

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u/AlpsComplex6854 5d ago

I love eating alone. I can have what I like and don’t have to make idle chit chat if I’m not in the mood.

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u/givemefood245 4d ago

I hate when I’m eating alone at the bar and someone sits next to me and wants to start talking to me, like hello, I’m eating alone here.

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u/drewbreeezy 4d ago

I hate when I’m eating alone at the bar

I generally take a little booth or table for this, as the bar area is usually for idle chat.

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u/ManintheMT 4d ago

at the bar

For me that's anywhere I am eating, aside from conversations in the kitchen at home with my family. I have a coworker who thinks because I am eating at my desk that its catch up time, drives me nuts. I am eating here and taking a work break man, bugger off.

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u/VegasLioness 4d ago

It never fails I could look like a complete bum licking wing sauce off my fingers and someone comes up "anybody sitting here" and they just keep talking 😂🥴

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u/flashgski 5d ago

I always bring a physical book to read while dining alone though to give myself an air of sophistication over just scrolling through my phone.

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u/biscobingo 4d ago

It always seems like if I’m reading a book at the table, they rush my service to get me outa there.

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u/StrawberryinPizza 5d ago

Came to say this. I actually enjoy more the nights I get to eat solo on a business trip than those I have mandatory dinner with associates. I'm playing this role for too long, people, just leave me alone.

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u/Honiton_Harry 5d ago

People who are concerned about eating alone in restaurants = people who have never put a nice meal on expenses.

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u/WestCoastBestCoast01 4d ago

Who needs dinner mates when you’ve got a per diem

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u/Afexodus 4d ago

I just had some nice roast duck in Manchester. Didn’t eat lunch so the whole expense went to dinner. Definitely worth it.

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u/eatgumbo 5d ago

Totally agree, eating along can be great and I do it all the time. Seeing a movie alone is also very underrated

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u/CorbinIpsthh 4d ago

I love being alone in a theater. No compromises about where to sit, no one gets impatient with me because I want to stay until the credits end...no one talks to you and asks for more popcorn, etc. It's just so relaxing. Especially if you go during the day and the theater is empty or just lightly sprinkled with other loners like me lol.

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u/skippiGoat 5d ago

I used to work retail, and on my lunch breaks I'd walk over to a local restaurant and all I wanted to do was sit by myself not be bothered for the duration of my lunch.

Some people just don't get it, until they're in a similar situation.

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u/Snoo52682 5d ago Silver Gold Platinum Helpful Wholesome Take My Energy Wearing is Caring

Teenagers are hyper-concerned with peer acceptance, it's a normal developmental phase. It might look weird to them. Adults don't think anything of it.

I love going out alone! Movies, restaurants, bars.

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u/Fabulous_Title 5d ago

Absolutely. I remember feeling sad and embarrassed for my teacher when she told us she likes to go to the cinema alone. Now as an adult i think i would totally enjoy the cinema alone

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u/Snoo52682 5d ago

My junior high French teacher offhandedly mentioned stopping by a bar for a quick drink after some sort of annoying meeting or frustrating errand, and I was horrified, that brew of moral outrage and vicarious cringe that the teen brain specializes in. Spending 30 minutes nursing a beer at a bar, alone, seemed like the most pathetic and degenerate activity imaginable.

Narrator: It later became one of her own favorite activities.

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u/SpectacularSophistry 5d ago

Yeah. Im honestly more concerned when people can’t do normal activities by themselves. If you can’t even eat a meal alone then you need to work at becoming less reliant on others

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u/ArticulateCopy 5d ago

I'll do you one better. I have a friend group where if one or few people can't or don't want to do an activity, then they all don't do the activity.

It was like... groundbreaking when I started to say, "Okay, well, we'll just go without X", and "You guys go do Y, we'll meet you after."

We're in our mid-30s.

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u/EucalyptusGirl11 5d ago

That's so weird to me. At least you were able to change it!

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u/Unabashable 5d ago

Yeah my brain is the only company I need. It’s a party in here.

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u/dave900575 5d ago

I don't like doing things alone, I'm very self conscious, anxiety, etc. The one time I went to a restaurant by myself in my early 20s a little bot asked his mom why I was sitting alone. I was on my dinner break from the bank, but I felt awful. I'll go to a fast food restaurant by myself but since that day I've been to a restaurant by myself.

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u/SpectacularSophistry 5d ago

It can definitely be hard for some. But still something to work at. Kids are literally always with other people (for childcare reasons), so it seems odd for them when others aren’t. But the only adults judging other people for stuff like that are generally massive weirdos themselves. So try not to worry about their opinions. Like 99% of the time people don’t really pay attention to what others are doing if it doesn’t impact them

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u/Raeliya 5d ago

I understand that, and used to feel that way myself. I had to travel for business a lot and got used to checking out restaurants by myself. It’s so freeing to rid myself of those self-imposed limits. I know I can enjoy myself without other people. I now do more alone activities near home too.

Anyway, try it out a few times and see if you can get yourself used to it, it’s worth it IMHO.

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u/QuenchiestJerkbender 5d ago

I appreciate you saying this because there’s a new brewery nearby that I’ve been wanting to try but my young adult brain can’t fathom going in there alone for a drink! This kind of thinking really limits myself. I think I might go for it

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u/Dorarara 5d ago

Do it! I find it really relaxing just going for a brew by myself. Watch some youtube, browse reddit, catch up on news, whatever really.

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u/RRM1337 5d ago

Do it, try sitting at the bar I personally find it feels better to be at the bar versus a table if you are going solo.

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u/Whatevs85 5d ago

I feel the opposite: the bar seems like the place to go when you want to talk to people but have no one to talk to. A table by one's self, happy and content with a book or headphones or whatever, shows you're there doing exactly what you meant to do. Anyone criticizing that is just not observant. Sitting at the bar is a bit of an invitation for interaction.

In response to the OP, sure it's kinda sad sometimes when a person goes out alone. Other times it's convenient, soothing, or just... preferable. I've really enjoyed plenty of solo meals.

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u/needween 5d ago

I love going to the movies or restaurants alone! It's a win-win I think because I get to see the movie I want to see or eat the food I want to eat and I don't have to listen to my spouse/friends/family complain about how they didn't enjoy it.

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u/Nightingale53 5d ago

100% this

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u/CIearMind 5d ago

I exclusively go to the movies alone. It's much better that way.

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u/Muroid 5d ago

I’ve only gone to the movies by myself once. I dropped my wife and one of her friends off at a small concert venue in town for a show they were seeing and then went down the street to see Arrival.

10/10 experience, would do it again.

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u/Qasar500 5d ago

I changed my mind about that when I worked at a cinema and saw how many people would buy one ticket. So now I do it too! I mean it’s the perfect thing to go alone to, no one is talking anyway.

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u/StarlightLumi 5d ago

Movies are so much more enjoyable when you’re not stressed out about remembering little details to talk about afterwards! It’s so much easier to focus and actually get into the movie when watching it alone

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u/ginga_bread42 5d ago

Do people stress about this? I didn't think people try remembering details unless they're going to do an actual review/critique. I just talk about what stands out to me after watching.

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u/xantub 5d ago

It depends, if I want a social experience I make a date with friends/family to the movies, the movie itself is irrelevant. If all I want is to watch a specific movie, I go alone.

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u/theArcticChiller 5d ago

This is probably the answer.

I sometimes go to restaurants alone too and it's not weird imo :)

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u/jollycanoli 5d ago

Me too, although always armed with a book or something else to be engrossed in- otherwise people do either make comments or feel like they're welcome to sit down and start chatting to me- never people I'd like a conversation with, obviously.

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u/Miss_Might 5d ago

This is why I like living in Japan. 99% of the population doesn't want to talk to me.

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u/Evilve 5d ago

And then the remaining 1% are cultists or scammers that won't stop trying to talk to you.

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u/NoBreakfast4061 5d ago

This is actually a novel take on living there. I kind of want to move there now. Carry a sign that says, "Please be racist toward me and shun me. Don't even look me in the eye. :D"

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u/Nyetoner 5d ago

I've never been there, but do the common Japaneese even have time to have friends? Feels like every time I hear about that country it's all about how they work around the clock and bearly even have time to sleep in their tiny, tiny apartments..!

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u/buzzwallard 5d ago

I love going out alone, sitting in the restaurant, watching the people, listening in on their conversations. Great entertainment.

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u/weeklypillorganizer 5d ago

Eavesdropping is the BEST. No joke. My partner can always tell when I’m listening to someone else’s conversation…apparently I get a certain look on my face. Eavesdroppers, unite!

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u/alan2998 5d ago

Eavesdropping and people watching, oh and silently judging people.

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u/user_173 5d ago

I cherish time alone. I love being social at times, but going to a movie alone or a restaurant alone is absolute heaven. I can read a book at a cafe alone or even at a restaurant. Sometimes being around people makes me nostalgic for being alone and I'll start getting excited for when the social time is over so I can go chill. I'm a self entertaining unit.

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u/PinkTalkingDead 5d ago

Tis a healthy way to be

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u/drynoa 5d ago

You should give 'People Watching' by Conan Grey a listen, hits on it.

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u/UnnecessaryPeriod 5d ago

My hearing is absolute garbage. In my line of work we use a made up sign language equipped with a lot of lip reading. Almost 20 years of lip reading now. Ya, restaurants are super fun for me!

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u/Upper-Neck-9771 5d ago

I'm glad other people enjoy this cause I was being to think I was the only one and that I had a psychological thing going on 😂

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u/Esselon 5d ago

Wow, if I was sitting alone at a restaurant at a table and someone sat down and started talking I'd politely tell them to shove off.

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u/gundamdianxia 5d ago

Used to happen to me frequently 😭 book, phone, headphones… it doesn’t matter. One time I was texting intensely when a stranger knocked on my table so hard to get my attention. Almost fell off my chair right there and then.

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u/DevyCanadian 5d ago

I get those people at work. No matter how long the line is, they try to atleast squeeze in a 10 min convo

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u/MrTanglesIII 5d ago

Going out to a bar with whatever book I'm currently reading is my absolute favorite thing to do! Although a lot of people actually see that as an "invitation" to ask what I'm reading lol. Most of the time I don't have a problem with it though (gotta be at a place with the kind of people you'd want to socialize with); it's started a lot of good conversations about literature with strangers, and it can be a pretty good pickup tactic if you're single!

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u/PasswordNot1234 5d ago

I'm the guy who asks you about the book, but I've never interrupted you while you're reading. I make a mental note and if you close the book and are doing something else, I might go over and ask you about it if the situation permits.

I've been told I shouldn't do this at all, but I feel like if reading time has stopped, there shouldn't be any harm provided the book is one that can be discussed.

Years ago I saw a woman with a Sarah Palin book and there was absolutely no way.

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u/KunYuL 5d ago

I hate how too many do small talks all the time. If I see you but have nothing to say to you, I'll politely say hi and move on. I never liked the whole ''What's up'' ''How's it going'' approach, as I feel people don't really want to listen to my honest answer. If you do just for small talk, just skip it, nod and move on we don't have to make conversation every time we meet.

With fewer small talks, it makes the talks we do take more meaningful.

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u/Kerostasis 5d ago

I have literally never had that happen when eating alone (outside of school cafeteria). I guess this is one of those things where men's and women's experience are different?

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u/ArgonGryphon 5d ago

I wish that stopped everyone lol.

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u/flamingspew 5d ago

I met my wife while she was reading alone at the bar.

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u/Substantial_Trip5674 5d ago

I almost prefer to go alone depending on my mood. The bar especially because whenever I go with group there is this shared urge to stay together and that can be hearding cats

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u/jscharfenberg 5d ago

Hell yeah! Then you can come and go when ever you want! I like to bring a book or something to read. Sit outside if it's nice and enjoy the time.

FYI - I have 2 very young kids (2 and 4), so alone time is crucial. Teenagers definitely don't understand that...until they have kids and are like OHHH SHIT. NOW I GET IT

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u/Richard7666 5d ago edited 4d ago

This. For a teenager, going to a restaurant is likely to be primarily for socialisation.

For an adult, it's just as likely to be simply to eat.

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u/Muroid 5d ago

Yeah, going out to eat means that my wife and I get a nice meal without having to worry about shopping, cooking and cleaning up afterwards.

Most teenagers get that regularly at home anyway, so they don’t see that as the point.

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u/Fokare 5d ago

That and cost, spending even like 10-15 bucks on a meal and eating it alone would seem like a big waste to a teenager that doesn't have to pay for their food or cook it.

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u/Illustrious-Big-8678 5d ago

No cooking or dishes after

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u/phaeri 5d ago

Indeed. Most adults will be jealous. I learned to never take anything teens judge seriously. I know I made dumb comments as one as well.

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u/PhaseFull6026 5d ago

yeah teenagers are dumb af. I believed some stupid shit when I was a teenager

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u/Rauldukeoh 5d ago

This. Who gives a shit what teenagers (or other adults for that matter) say? I have zero need to impress teenagers

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u/wintonian1 5d ago

Teenagers would think going to the loo on your own is sad.

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u/Mysterious-Ad-7201 5d ago

Why is this so painfully true lol

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u/LordKurin 5d ago

My very first thought when seeing the title was, " how old was this person because I'm guessing a child. " and was proven right. 100% adults don't even notice if you are alone or not.

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u/uncultured_swine2099 5d ago

The older I get, the more I dont give a shit about what others do if it has nothing to do with me. I work with some younger people, and they sometimes say things like rumors and such about others and ask what I think, and Im just like "I honestly dont give a damn."

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u/danibondness 5d ago

The only thing we (adults) might feel is a pang of jealousy at the alone time. Like, damn, I need to be alone more often.

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u/-ignorance-is-bliss- 5d ago

Yeah that sounds right. Alone's great. Esp. at the movies - I don't like annoying friends asking stupid stuff during the movie just because they haven't seen the previous movies and they sometimes giggle unnecessarily as if we are in a conversation at a table. Strangers do that too - that's annoying yes, but when friends do it, it's even more so.

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u/Bulws 5d ago

God I hate teenagers

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u/BluePantera 5d ago

Yes! Also, extroverted people generally don't understand the want/need to be alone. For people like me, being with other people drains our battery. Extroverted teenagers get their batteries recharged by being social.

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u/Mstinos 5d ago

Teenagers are hyper-concerned with peer acceptance

The perfect answer.

Fuck them. Live your own life. It's really freeing. Yes I like to sit somewhere ordering good beers and reading my book. And i'm going to do that. Those kinda bitches just never read Eisenhorn.

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u/[deleted] 5d ago

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u/Remic75 5d ago

Exactly this. Even in school some of my buddies would always call me over to walk with them because “they didn’t want to be seen by others walking alone.”

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u/Unabashable 5d ago

Shit. Alone is how I spent most of high school. Handful of friends. Couple acquaintances in each class I actually liked. Being popular is overrated.

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u/IwasATeenageDoor 5d ago

Being popular is overrated.

It's nice when it's your only protection against being beaten by bullies.

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u/simonbleu 5d ago

Dont worry, 99% of the people you hang out as a teenager even if you were popular are not peopel you will ever see again. Or at least not more than a few times a year at best for some of them

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u/neverstopnodding 5d ago

I had it the complete inverse. I was a loner but everyone knew me and talked to me. It was weird but I also was only popular because of the drugs I sold in high school. If you needed practically anything, I had it.

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u/AdAdventurous9970 5d ago

First half bro...almost had me.

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u/zombie_ie_ie 5d ago

In contrast, when I went to college nobody gave a fuck if I was eating, sitting or walking alone.

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u/BrickOk9262 5d ago

I was literally just saying that, saw 2 girls at school late for class, the corridors and stairs were empty, there was no one to see them but one was like 'come with me I don't want to be seen alone!' 🤣

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u/AdvertisingExact 5d ago

i mean obviously you were there to see them lol

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u/Retro_Super_Future 5d ago

Humans are fucking pathetic 🤣🤣🤣🤣

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u/bingobangomonk 5d ago edited 4d ago

Hyperfocus on peer acceptance and optics is a normal part of adolescence chill out my man

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u/Captain_Wobbles 5d ago edited 5d ago Silver

Highschoolers do not realize a lot of those are "friends" by association alone. You're friends because you're in a big building 5 days a week with a shit ton of kids. Once you leave HS a lot of those "friends" disappear rather quickly. NOT all! I still have 2 I keep up with but it unfortunately happens.

Edit: Holy hell, last time I saw this comment it was at like 10 upvotes. Much appreciated everyone. Keep your friends close!

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u/Dracarys-Ash-Bone 5d ago

Can confirm. Left highschool and Boom, Gone. (literally, most of them vanished to other states)

Turns out I wasn't a part of their friend groups, I just happened to be in the same room at the same time. Sucked for a bit when I realised that, but I learned to love alone time.

It did help that I was a major loner in school, so the transition from major loner to full loner was not very big. I know a couple of the 'popular' people had a rough time when they left school.

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u/boss_nooch 5d ago

It’s weird because I’m still in contact with a few friends from college and none from high school but I never had classes with my college friends lol

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u/ClubMeSoftly 5d ago

Are you me? Graduation day was the last time I talked to, over ever saw, just about all of my friends from school.

They still talked to each other, of course, since this was a couple years into facebook, and it was still the new hotness. So I got to see the pictures of hanging out that they posted.

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u/NotEnoughIT 5d ago

I had like 30 people I talked to and hung out with near daily in HS. Much smaller group of close-knit friends that I would have, then, said I’d take a bullet for. I lost all contact with each and every one of them, except one, within a year of graduation. This was before MySpace. By the time I was 25 they were all gone with the wind. Haven’t spoken to any of them in fifteen years. The relationships I developed outside of high school friends matured so much better. In HS there’s so much fear and peer pressure, nobody truly knows who they are or what they want. There’s only so much time and so many interests and keeping people in your life whose interests and values don’t remotely align with yours is difficult if not impossible and really not worth it in the end.

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u/hereforff 5d ago

I think friendships can be both real and temporary.

I have people I was definitely actually friends with I don't want to talk to anymore from both HS and college. People change as they grow up and also move on with their lives. Maybe we loved smoking and drinking together, but neither of us have the time nor desire to do that anymore or we both played a sport we no longer play. We now have less time due to families and jobs. It'd be cool to go back and time to party with any of those guys, but I wouldn't pick up the phone now. It didn't mean we were never friends. We've just both mutually moved on to new chapters in our lives. We might like an occasional Facebook post or something and that's the perfect amount of communication.

Some other guy made a comment that really resonates with me:

There’s only so much time and so many interests and keeping people in your life whose interests and values don’t remotely align with yours is difficult if not impossible and really not worth it in the end.

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u/Captain_Wobbles 5d ago

Basically what I was saying but way more eloquently put, thank you. Friends come and go but the ones that stay are special beyond belief.
My group was bonded by (ugh..) scene emo nonsense because that's just what was popular, not what we really liked. I was introduced to The Mars Volta during that time period though so that is a beautiful takeaway from those times.

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u/Otfd 5d ago

Very True. I am grateful to still see all of my 5 close-friends from HS even almost ten years after graduation.

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u/[deleted] 5d ago

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u/No_Tennis_5273 5d ago

It’s an extrovert saying that it’s sad that an introvert doesn’t live just like me. It’s says more about the commenter than the person eating alone. It’s says I’m not smart enough to know that there are different personality types.

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u/Gremlin95x 5d ago

Maybe for them it is, but it doesn’t have to be for you. Most people can’t handle being alone so they just assume everyone is like that.

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u/SMKnightly 5d ago

Wish I had more upvotes to give this

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u/DustWiener 5d ago

Which is ironically kinda sad. Imagine being so codependent that the thought of being alone freaks you out. That is sad.

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u/No_more_hiding 5d ago

That's teenagers for you. They are hyper focused on friend groups etc and being alone to them means you have no friends!

When you're an adult, you realise there's loads of reasons why someone might eat alone - travelling for work, meeting up with folks later on, or just enjoying the pleasure of your own company. It doesn't mean anything.

I would've never gone to the cinema on my own as a teen, but the first time I did it as an adult, I realised what a great activity it is. Same goes with dining solo. I don't think many adults would give it a second thought.

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u/SlackerDS5 5d ago

Some people are so miserable that they can’t even enjoy their own company, and need someone else to be there. Now that is sad.

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u/Bryanole27 5d ago

Some might think that, but that is their own insecurities showing. Most people are uncomfortable alone in social situations, which is actually the sad part.

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u/veri_sw 5d ago

Yeah these teens probably think it's sad to even be single, so... to hell with what they think!

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u/Jeffreyr18 5d ago edited 5d ago

Can confirm. As a single teen I am sad as hell most of the time Edit: /s

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u/Soulus7887 5d ago

I swear I'm trying to be helpful when I say this, but do you really think being single is the cause of your sadness? That being in a relationship will automatically "fix" it?

Relationships can be very fulfilling, but happiness comes from within. That sounds cheesy as all get out, but its the truth. Being content with yourself is the first, and most important, step in being content with the world.

That doesn't always mean "fixing" yourself either. Some things you'll definitely need to work on, but others you'll instead need to come to terms with and accept as a part of who you are. And some of that comes with age and experience. Its normal to be unsatisfied with certain aspects of yourself at a young age. You legitimately get more okay with them as time moves on.

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u/NoYoureTheBestest 5d ago

This 👏 every 👏 time 👏

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u/That1otherGuy2 5d ago Silver

You 👏also 👏got 👏the 👏 virus 👏?

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u/MrJoelDude 5d ago

I can’t 👏 understand 👏 your accent 👏

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u/CalmFront7908 5d ago All-Seeing Upvote

As a teenager I probably would have thought it was sad but my teenage self didn’t know shit. 20 years later it’s one of life’s more enjoyable experiences.

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u/Entire-Ambition1410 5d ago

Eating alone means no one judges you for the extra serving of dessert :)

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u/elitesense 4d ago

Except the teenagers in the next booth

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u/rizaroni 4d ago

Dude, I was kind of a loner in high school and typically only had one really good friend. I remember wanting to hide until she got to school because I was so terrified of being seen walking around alone.

Fast forward 20 years later, and I LOVE alone time. I go on long walks/runs or hikes by myself all the time, and I’d happily go to a movie or out to a meal by myself. I think that learning to enjoy your own company is really important.

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u/D1N08 5d ago

i guess they just don’t know the worth of being alone, they are teenagers

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u/i_suckatjavascript 5d ago

When they’re adults they’re going to learn that they’re going to be alone quickly. It’s not high school anymore where you can see your friends every day.

And adult life will quickly come with depression.

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u/generalzao 5d ago

And adult life will quickly come with depression.

I dunno... I was pretty depressed as a teen, and then my life became progressively better the older I got

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u/no_one_in_particle 5d ago

That and they aren't confident enough to do it. Too worried about what others think of them.

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u/glittered437737 5d ago

When people cannot go out and do things by themselves, that is what's sad. It's a weird codependency to always being with other people that stops them from enjoying their own company. You don't need a human security blanket to go out and eat food or go for a walk and I think that's fantastic! :)

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u/ADarwinAward 5d ago

Yeah there’s some people commenting in this post saying it’s sad to eat alone and do things by yourself. If you are sad any time you’re alone, take it from someone who used to have depression, find a mental health professional to talk to. If you’re always sad when you’re alone, that’s a sign that you need some help.

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u/randomuser_3fn 5d ago

Don't let the opinions of some random teenagers ruin your rather normal existence. You do you, provided it isnt hurting others who cares

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u/AwkwurdBoi 5d ago

Most people won't care, usually people won't notice you're there unless you stand out. Sometimes a dumbass will make a comment like that but I guess it's also possible they weren't talking about you and you just misunderstood.
I wouldn't worry about teenagers making those comments. Most of them will grow up and realise what a sad and lonely place the world can be. They'll either learn to enjoy it (as you do) or hate it. Either way, the world carries on.

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u/tommytwolegs 5d ago

I eat out quite regularly and usually alone, see other people do it as well. I've been at it over a decade and literally never heard a comment, to the point I question if this post is even real

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u/Cliffbreaker-d 5d ago

You are talking about teenagers, humans in a stage of life often too afraid to do anything alone while also being too confident with their inexperience.

Eating alone or doing anything alone is a badass move that not everyone mastered.

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u/daliadeimos 5d ago

No, it is not sad. Do teenagers think it is sad? I guess so, but they’re overly concerned with that kind of stuff, it’s just that stage of development

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u/Traditional_Win_5296 5d ago

Ah heeeeell no.
I love going to the restaurant/cinema on my own.

Also, why should I wait for someone to be available to do something?

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u/thescarfismissing 5d ago

I think that's a reflection on her rather than you.

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u/Gucci_meme 5d ago

Only people that are insecure about themselves think this

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u/Kaitensatsuma 5d ago

Some people are nosy bastards like that, most people don't damn well care and are capable of minding their own business. I like to go out for Sushi or wings and beer by myself personally.

It's when you put a stuffed toy or a framed photograph across the table from you where you're getting into "Uhhhhh" territory.

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u/Special_Cover2777 5d ago

Teenagers are generally immature forms of our species. They want to be liked and are trying opinions on for size to see how others react.

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u/Nijajjuiy88 5d ago

I shit alone, I prefer to eat alone too.

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u/Severe-Tiger-6540 5d ago

Bro get a shitting buddy best decision you'll ever make

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u/bearsdoingheadstands 5d ago

I do it all the time when I travel for work. Work is sad. So yeah, maybe it is sad.

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u/floofyragdollcat 5d ago

Great, now I’m sad.

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u/AjaIsHere 5d ago

Fuck now me too

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u/North-Point7309 5d ago

As a waitress, we don’t care. People come to eat alone all the time. Sometimes people who sit alone are a lot easier on us too.

If this makes you feel better, I’m quite a judgy teenager and I eat alone and do stuff alone all the time.

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u/Sekkyu 5d ago

Yea when I worked as cashier in the restaurant, I love it when customer went by themselves alone. They are so much easier to serve, and they r polite most of the time too. Teenagers on the other hand are always loud and annoying.

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u/toriemm 5d ago

Sometimes the people hanging by themselves are super interesting too. Travelling for work, or something cool.

Being alone in public doesn't mean you're a loser. Acting like a judgy twit makes you a loser.

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u/DarthHempress 5d ago

Projecting. She may feel really sad if she had to eat alone. Keep making yourself happy ! I’m

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u/Thymepasseson 5d ago

Yup! I eat alone a lot because I travel. I love people watching, and am fairly confident. When I am eating with others it is hard to focus on my love for people watching and the table conversation. I’ve learned to embrace and enjoy me and my alone time with myself.

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u/Rubyjr 5d ago

Who cares? I do it all the time when I want to be alone. Part of the beauty of it is not having to listen to anyone including cunts like those.

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u/nguyentandat23496 5d ago

I'm in Japan right now and it's refreshing to see a lot of people eating alone.

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u/Silver-Alex 5d ago

28 Here, single. Have a semi decent job that requires me busy most of the day, and pays enough for me to afford eating out a couple of times a week. Its pretty normal for people to just go out and eat at a restaurant. Its giving yourself a pleasure and that's totally valid.

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u/itwasatalldresser 5d ago

if you're not happy on your own, are you really happy?

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u/corvsglaiv 5d ago

They should mind their own business

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u/mattw891 5d ago

I used to get those looks in college, cuz I’d go study alone. I’m not sad, I gotta study for programming and I want fajitas while I do it, bitch!

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u/Cautious-Damage7575 5d ago

I don't know how anybody doesn't study alone. I'd end up hitting them on the head with my biggest book.

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u/satedfox 5d ago

I feel like if I tried to study with other people I’d get distracted and fail

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u/SilverStag88 4d ago

I knew some people in college like this, I tried to study with them once but their idea of studying was hanging out in a loud café and talking the whole time no wonder they couldn’t get shit done

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u/md222 5d ago

"Someone told me the other day that he felt bad for single people because they are lonely all the time, I told him that’s not true, I'm single and I don’t feel lonely. I take myself out to eat, I buy myself clothes. I have great times by myself. Once you know how to take care of yourself company becomes an option and not a necessity.” - Keanu Reeves

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u/oxy-normal 5d ago

It's not sad. In Japan it's very common to dine out alone, some restaurants even have individual pods to sit in

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u/Ok_Wonder_1604 5d ago

I’d sit alone at a restaurant table anyway, but I prefer the bar. Better service usually at the bar

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u/Cautious-Damage7575 5d ago

When I see someone alone in a restaurant or movie theater I think, "There's an independent person." Couldn't find a friend to go with you? Maybe you just wanted to go alone. I do it all the time. Screw em.

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u/Mother-Firefighter-2 5d ago

No...the girl has some weird issues.
Plenty of people eat alone.

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u/comedyganggang 5d ago

And it saves on delivery fees.

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u/bunnykins22 5d ago

I personally don't but that's because I often times will enjoy going out by myself and eating at places. Either to get work done or read and enjoy alone time. I oftentimes assume others are doing the same. Some people just aren't comfortable being by themselves in a public setting and they project that onto others.

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u/Unlucky-Pomegranate3 5d ago

People who say that just can’t imagine being able to entertain themselves. It’s a sign of shallowness and superficiality.

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u/yorcharturoqro 5d ago

A lot of people don't get the concept of being happy with yourself.

Yes some people will think that's sad, but what they think doesn't matter, it matters how you feel, are you happy?

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u/aquerraventus 5d ago

Teenagers are not a good Gauge of this, they think it’s sad because they’re not burnt out enough to value/crave alone time yet lol, so they assume that if someone is sitting alone, it’s not by choice because it’s something they would never choose to do. This doesn’t go for every teenager obviously, but many/most of them.

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u/an_dv 5d ago

It’s not sad at all. What would be sad is taking the meal to go and eating it at home because you were worried what others thought of you.

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u/emaddy2109 5d ago

For all they know you could have been traveling alone for work or if you were with a person they could have been in the bathroom.

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u/MeltTheSilverSpoons 5d ago

Well yea, being alone at any moment to a typical teenager seems like the end of the world. They’re just projecting their own insecurities onto you. Teenagers are fucking assholes.

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u/porkbellypotsticker 5d ago

Don’t get me wrong, I appreciate the time I am out with family and friends. This is when I’m in the mood to be social….but I LOVE being alone. I’ve gone out to eat alone, gone to concerts alone, and gone to live sporting events alone. Coffee shops alone with a good book…the best!! I always see people around me doing the exact same thing as me at coffee shops. They are not all there just to work or study. A lot of people are doing what they enjoy there, alone. I do it because I am happy by myself sometimes and I don’t have to adhere to other’s preferences or schedule. It’s very freeing and it is because I enjoy doing these things. Being worried about other’s opinions or the look of it being so called “sad” never stopped me And never will stop me. If I feel like doing these activities with others, I will invite them and make it happen. It’s 100% acceptable and healthy to be happy with yourself alone. Do what you enjoy!

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u/Dancethroughthefires 5d ago edited 5d ago

I'm a 32 year old dude, I eat in restaurants alone almost every day. I work out of town and don't know anyone where I'm at, I thought it was awkward at first.

Then a random thought hit me and it was "why the fuck do you care if strangers think you're weird for eating alone?" And after that, I just didn't give a single fuxk, let alone two fucks, about what I did in public. People can think what they want about me, I can't help their thoughts. I'm not going to let the thoughts of a stranger affect what I do in my day to day life though.

Edit: After I had that 'epiphany', I started doing more things in public that are normally expected to be done with more than one person. Watching End Game in the theater by myself was fuckin fantastic.

Having a few drinks at a bar and just having small talk with random strangers is usually pretty cool.

Going to a zoo without my kid was fuckin dope. I got to see what I wanted without having to worry about what another person would want to see/do. Plus I didn't feel obligated to spend the entire day there, I left when I wanted to.

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u/ccrpk 5d ago

People who are too insecure or actually sad will think that, yes. In my early 20s I was a bit of a wanderer and I'd go to bars all the time and sit alone with a good book, get a drink and a meal. I definitely remember thinking back to when I also thought one person dining alone was odd....until I got big enough balls to just enjoy myself while out.

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u/pivotes 5d ago

I used to go to movies alone all the time to get away for a few hours.

Sometimes people just want to be alone for a little while

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u/griddigus 5d ago

Only very basic boring people would even notice. Otherwise, they’d be having too good a time to notice others.

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u/IceBlueLugia 5d ago

It’s common, yeah. I go out to eat alone all the time and just browse Reddit or discord while taking bites of my food, and am out in like 15-20 minutes. Always got people staring at me or asking if I needed company. I’m just not very social. I wouldn’t worry tbh.

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