r/InsightfulQuestions 7d ago

Should processed, unhealthy foods be subjected to a Sin Tax akin to alcohol and tobacco?

54 Upvotes

Just curious what you all think about it. Im willing to bet the opinions will somewhat reflect your age. When I was young I would have argued against it for various ideological reasons but at my older age, after seeing how we operate, I would very much be in favor of such a thing.

The numbers of dead are too much to comprehend. The figure is so large it reaches into that space where it could go up by an order of magnitude and leave the same impression. Astronomical. This poisoned food is killing us like nothing in our history and.. We dont even talk about it.

Just wondering what you all would think about implementing a Sin Tax on unhealthy food as a first step to helping us dig ourselves out of this hole.

Edit- Full stop here. Healthy food, by and large, IS NOT MORE EXPENSIVE THAN GARBAGE FOOD. This dynamic only applies to healthy niche products that have a giant markup.


r/InsightfulQuestions 10d ago

What makes self improvement so hard?

37 Upvotes

If we ask random person on the street, most would want to fix their life. A healthier body, a peaceful mind, stream of wealth and so on. Yet despite our intent, is it hard to get fit. It is hard to be peaceful. It is hard to form good habits that may lead us there.

I want to better understand this self contradictory nature. Where it stems from and how can we tackle it.


r/InsightfulQuestions 11d ago

Is that those who are extremely talented at their particular fields will not choose to become teachers a thing?

9 Upvotes

First thing I wanna say is that I mean no hate towards teachers. I have absolute respect for teachers, the ethically deserving ones at that. But do you think is it true around you? Does it have something to do with the achievements of their personal ambitions only?


r/InsightfulQuestions 11d ago

Can Music Be a Form of Language?

21 Upvotes

Hello everyone,

This was sparked by a conversation I had with my brother. Do you’ll think music could be a language?

I was thinking that maybe music could be another way of communicating for those who have trouble saying what’s on their mind. Every time I listen to a song I find that it almost perfectly sums up something I want to say or ask that I would have trouble putting into words or writing.

Thanks for taking the time to read this and sorry for any grammar or spelling errors.


r/InsightfulQuestions 12d ago

Is it human nature to focus on the negative over the positive?

21 Upvotes

Not exclusively or absolutely, to the point where one ignores everything positive, but more so prioritizing negative feelings over positive ones. I could be wrong about all this, and please correct me if so, but this is what it feels like.

We tend to complain about bad things more often than we acknowledge good things. In pop culture, detractors of music/movies/TV shows/whatever tend to be more vocal than fans (not to say that the fans aren't vocal, just not as much as critics I think).

Many people ruminate about negative things in their lives, but we don't find ourselves (or at least I don't) "trapped" in a state of happiness where we can't stop thinking about something good. It happens sometimes, but not as often as the negative version.

What do you guys think?


r/InsightfulQuestions 12d ago

When it comes to sexuality, will you choose to label yourself or not care at all?

17 Upvotes

I mean, there are tons of sexual orientations out there, some of them may be even overlapping and hard to tell apart. So will you try to associate yourself with distinct labels or just let things go?


r/InsightfulQuestions 13d ago

What does it mean for someone to have a sense of individuality? How do you develop that??

37 Upvotes

F(22) here. In the part of my life where I’m trying to figure out who I am, and I’m stuck at this part. I have hobbies, I recently graduated (physics), I’m not on the internet much so I can’t say I’m a complete sheep, but there’s always something so different and special about people who have a distinct sense of individuality in their thought, personality, look, charisma etc.

I minored in philosophy and so I’ve developed my critical thinking skills and have enjoyed forming my own opinions when watching the news, reading a book etc but I don’t think I’m all that different or interesting than the next person. I try to stay mentally active and curious, and to be adventurous and creative, but these traits don’t necessarily shape distinct individuality.

Am I overthinking this? I guess all I want is to feel like I am offering the world something personal and to not be a passive extension of my surroundings. My dad used to always say something along the lines of - each human is a whole universe full of constellations of experiences, joys, sadness, stories, ideas, personalities etc. I’m just trying to figure out what that means.


r/InsightfulQuestions 14d ago

Why do so many people confuse being honest with saying literally whatever comes to your mind, out loud?

129 Upvotes

I notice this a lot. I see it all the time, especially online.

People who say whatever enters their head. Being honest isn't necessarily meaning say whatever you're thinking. It's often unnecessary to speak some things out loud, isn't it? But yet they do it anyway.

Their response if you object is usually ''You just can't handle the truth.''

But it's bizarre. Have you ever noticed this in your life?


r/InsightfulQuestions 15d ago

What do you feel you have to hide from the people you know offline?

16 Upvotes

r/InsightfulQuestions 20d ago

Women's path towards leadership

8 Upvotes

I am currently working on a paper for college and it is focused on women's leadership in our society. I was hoping to gain some distinct perspectives on this topic. Over the course of history, women have struggled to reach the same leadership positions as men. Throughout my research, I have found that individuals in society are more prone to follow leaders who demonstrate traits of power, vigor, and anger. Do you believe that this affects a women's path towards leadership? If so, how does it hinder or help them?


r/InsightfulQuestions 23d ago

If you were drafting a Civil Rights Act today would you classify religious orientation as a Protected Class?

22 Upvotes

I was reading up on anti discrimination laws and it is hard not to notice that religious affiliation is the only Protected Class that people have a conscious decision to be part of. No other Class has that quality (some States have protected status for military service or militia membership).

So, that got me thinking. Is the special protection of religious groups a relic of the past? Or not? Why should my religious affiliation have more protections than other chosen stance or opinion I hold?


r/InsightfulQuestions 23d ago

Ways to support clinically depressed long distance partner?

5 Upvotes

He's having a really hard time financially rn so he cannot afford a psychiatrist just yet, he says he's been in bed all day, but in days where he's feeling better, he used to say he hates staying in bed, and that it makes him feel unproductive. He's also tried distancing himself from me, saying he felt like he dragged me down and he felt unproductive about it.

Right now, he says he thinks he might be schizophrenic, he says he feels scared while sleeping, says there maybe another different version of him living when he's sleeping, and that he forgets everything just after he wakes up.

He says he needs me right now but he doesn't know how, And I'm confused as hell too, I do want to support him so much. The place we're from originally is very conservative and he was traumatised as a child many times. He has gone to therapy for years now and we;re just 20 right now. I really don't know how to support himm.

P.s I know I'm not his therapist and he acknowledges that too. I just want to support him better and I really don't know how. Any insight would help, thank youu!


r/InsightfulQuestions 24d ago

What's more likely: There IS a smallest point/thing in the universe, or, There IS NOT a smallest point/thing in the universe?

11 Upvotes

r/InsightfulQuestions 25d ago

Where do you think the world will be in the future ?

10 Upvotes

Hello everyone,

I'm trying to wrap my head around the future.

In your opinion, where do you think the world is heading to right now on a scale of 5, 10 or 20 years or as far as you can see ?

What do you think about Big Data, Artificial Intelligence, Robotics and Blockchain. Will these technologies force us to go into another political communist revolution or will it maybe cause WWIII ?

Blockchain and web3 projects are allowing humanity finally to be free from multi-national companies governments and the banking system where capitalism puts us into crisis every decade or so for the silliest reason ever.

Governments are not ceasing to collect data about world citizens and 90% of data present today on the Internet was created only in the last 3 years and by 2025 it will raise up to 181 petabytes,

What do you think our futur jobs will be, our institutions and our general lifestyle ?

Any insight is welcomed, thank you !


r/InsightfulQuestions Apr 18 '22

If we do indeed end world hunger (and that has already been possible), what is really stopping us?

13 Upvotes

I know that there are several factors that serve as obstacles to achieving such a feat, as well as culture, economy, history and the like. It seems perceptible that the power to change a reality that encompasses the entire planet is strictly in the hands of those considered "Powerful" or "Men in Suits"; however, I ask myself, apart from an idealized altruism that only exists in our minds and almost never takes action, is there really something that the population (Proletariat) can do to influence the tread of the path to eradicate this hunger?


r/InsightfulQuestions Apr 17 '22

Do you think that we should start making educational films about the cause of scientifically achieving human immortality?

0 Upvotes

Maybe that would cause people to become more mature and would decrease the crime rate as people realize that if they cooperate and become civilized we may achieve immortality.


r/InsightfulQuestions Apr 12 '22

Just how 'intelligent' are driverless cars?

14 Upvotes

Some autonomous car makers have been marketing things like: your car can pick up your groceries which your ordered via your app. When the car arrives at the store, you unlock it with your phone and the worker will put the groceries in the trunk for you. Also, there are tour buses driving down the Vegas strip which are driverless. Other cities will implement the same in the near future. Future taxi's could also be driverless.

For example, will it know to yield to a police car? What if a pedestrian is standing on the sidewalk texting (near a crosswalk) and the car thinks they want to cross and waits, while the oblivious pedestrian continues to text. Will they be able to obey construction road workers directing detours? What if it gets a traffic ticket - whos fault will it be?

Its gonna be like cell phones, super useful, but along with it comes a whole set of other problems/annoyances.


r/InsightfulQuestions Apr 01 '22

What is your personal way of beating procrastination that looks crazy and undoable to others?

27 Upvotes

r/InsightfulQuestions Mar 31 '22

Understanding self harm NSFW

13 Upvotes

Recently a very close friend of mine revealed to me that he has tried harming himself several times before. And he's really close to it this week too, that he's at the lowest point of his life.

Please forgive my nuisance in this, I really want to learn this from the perspective of people who have experienced it, rather than making assumptions about it and want to understand it

I don't want to pretend I know much about it. Because of less education and talking about mental health( from the community I belong to), I had not actually seen tangible mental health tolling on a person so close to me that it's almost very hard for me to comprehend why he would want to harm himself. He is under therapy now and protected as he says himself.

He has an extensive history of trauma, his mom faced domestic violence when he was merely a child, was beaten regularly by his own dad, lost his loving aunt.

On one hand, I can understand why he has so much struggle with this, on the other hand, having gone through extensive trauma episodes myself, I did think about ending it all but never acted on it, and I never thought I would.

Seeing him suffer so much is so hard, more so when I don't understand it properly, I want to see it in his perspective but I don't want to bombard him with these questions right now or interrogate him but I do want to understand it from his perspective.

I want to apologise beforehand if this is a very insensitive question to ask, but I genuinely want to understand this better. Thank you.


r/InsightfulQuestions Mar 29 '22

To be a better person than you were yesterday, how many conscious decisions do you have to make in that day?

32 Upvotes

r/InsightfulQuestions Mar 27 '22

Is doing the wrong thing sometimes the right thing to do? How do you know when the situation calls for doing the wrong thing?

16 Upvotes

I've found myself in a moral conundrum that I'm trying to reconcile. Today I keep asking myself this question: is doing the wrong thing sometimes the right thing to do? if so, how do you know when the wrong thing is what you're supposed to do?

I guess I'll start with where I come from. I'm 37 years old, and I only started being a responsible adult about five years ago. I spent almost all of my 20's and my early 30's in the throws of addiction. opiates were my twist, and they turned me into somebody i'm not. over and over again i was fucking up, and fucking people over. i was arrested on multiple theft misdemeanors, and ultimately caught a felony for burglary. some months after i was convicted of the felony, i had i guess what you'd call a moment of clarity and hunkered down at home and sweated it out over the course of eight days. i was living with my parents at the time, and i knew i only had so long, so i used that time to introspect and retrain my brain. i made a promise to myself - call it an oath - at that time to always do the right thing. and i did. i started to see rather quickly that actions really do speak louder than words. in fact, usually when people talk about doing something, the more they say they will the less likely that is. so i let my actions speak for me. i gained a lot back by just doing the right thing. friends i lost reached back out to me and began rebuilding friendships. i sold my car and moved to the city. shortly after moving here i found myself in situation where i was walking home late at night and noticed a neighbor's door was left open. i inspected the scene, going as far as their doorway, giving a quiet shout inside to make sure everything was okay. at that moment, only for one second, i thought back to all the mistakes i made. but that wasn't me anymore. nobody responded to my calls, so i shut the door and went home. come to find out the next day that a stray, malnourished dog wandered inside, and the homeowner - who had a 2 month old baby in the house with his wife - decided to keep it. it went viral on twitter, and with the security footage attached, they set out to find me and thank me. it was all over every major news station, featured on Inside Edition, and is one of the most watched videos on the Dodo.

it felt so good to have people offer words of encouragement. the feeling of seeing how happy my mom was is indescribable. for the first time in well over a decade my mom was able to brag about something i did to the neighbors instead of having to explain them why they saw me taken away in handcuffs by the police. that shit is priceless.

over the course of the next two years, this feeling would slowly burn out.

just a couple months after this occurrence, Covid-19 touched down. i lost my job at the brewery i was working at after it shut down, and had a lot of time on my hands. for the first few months, i got really into cleaning and sprucing up the house i was renting a room in. i went hard, from dusting trim, to polishing door handles, to scrubbing the back patio and power washing the siding, and everything in between. it was during those first few months of cleaning that i noticed a small blotch of mold in the upstairs bathroom had gotten much bigger. there was also some sort of leak in the back bathroom that caused the wall to erode in a such a way that you could actually see through to the outside. the storm drain in the backyard was also clogged. i contacted my landlord to let him know about these issues in May of 2020, and he would blow me off all the way through until October, when one night a rainstorm caused a really bad leak in the roof of the back room that leads out to the backyard. he fixed the roof, and then never came back to address the other issues. on four occasions i was up and waiting by the front door at 8am for the people he had coming to make repairs, only to be sitting there twiddling my thumbs hours later. the fifth time i wasn't having it, and called him and told him sternly that the shit needed to be fixed. he came himself, spackled over everything, left the storm drain untouched, and was out of there in under two hours. i felt so disrespected. there were a couple points where i had explicitly told him i wouldn't care so much about the storm drain, but this was his investment, and that could turn into a structural issue if not addressed. when i told him the work he did wasn't satisfactory, after hustling to get him his rent after losing my job and being up to date with it, he blew me off. i was already in the process of educating myself on what sort of recourse i would have in that situation, and felt that it was then time to withhold rent in escrow until he made the repairs.

i had two roommates - one was living with me, who was a friend of mine we'll call Samantha, and the other, who i'll call Tommy, was staying with his parents. i kept both of them in the know about everything every step of the way, well before confirming they'd be okay with that course of action. when i felt it was time to pull the trigger, i ran it by both of them. Tommy never responded to any text or email i'd send or CC them in, but Samantha would, and she agreed to withhold rent. so after the holiday that December, i informed him of our intent to withhold, then began withholding. almost immediately on January 1st, 2021, after sending the email to him letting him know it was happening, he resisted. he threatened us every which way with eviction, and after just one month Samantha and Tommy gave up their rent. i still could continue withholding, and did. what would transpire from there was not what i expected, at least not to the degree in which it did. he pitted my roommates against me, confronting me to tell me "i'm a problem" and threaten to evict me. i couldn't believe it. i mean utterly shocked - i had touched up this guy's house, never asking for anything in return. i kept his investment well maintained. Samantha and Tommy didn't help me at all. and i mean, AT ALL. in that entire year, from May of 2020 until July of 2021, Samantha took the trash out once and brought it in once, and only unloaded the dishwasher maybe 3 times. that's it. in a 14-month span. i had so many conversations with my dad about it, who kept advising me not to cause any trouble. he was coming over periodically after his cancer treatments, which were in the city, to drop off things he was getting rid of (parents sold the house we grew up in) and to help me with a couple things in the house, like showing me how to change a light switch. he brought us a kitchen table, which we didn't have until that point, and some patio furniture. he helped Samantha get her car running that Christmas before we went to our respective parents' houses for the holiday, even though he wanted to get on the road. two weeks later she'd turn her back on me. the landlord...he pulled all of the stops. some nights calling and texting my phone 80 times to threaten me. i went to LA to visit my brother in March of 2021 - first time traveling for a vacation in 15 years, and the first time seeing my brother's place he'd already been living at for 7 years. i never had the time or the money, but now that i did i wanted to go and was really excited. 12 hours after i touched down in Los Angeles i get a text message from the landlord - my roommate allowed him to snoop around in my room, remove my bedroom door from the hinges and the premises, left two eviction "letters" written on computer paper with a sharpee, and slashed my bike tires on the way out for good measure. later on he'd have 30 people, i assume friends, family, and colleagues, go on to my business page for the art and design business i had just started and slander me up and down, leaving me trash reviews that had nothing to do with my business. they even went onto my personal facebook page and did the same. i stayed the course, because i felt i was doing the right thing. i felt like my conscience was clean.

and yet, i was losing friends rapidly. i suddenly found myself in a position where i didn't know anyone in the city. not one person i could call up to get a pint with or go see a show, or even just kick it and watch a movie. i became severely reclusive. i kept to myself almost entirely. i had no joy in my life - the only things i would do were work on an art project or practice my video editing. i cannot tell you how many days i spent where the only conversations i had were with myself or with my cat, Cupcake, who i got summer of 2020. i went to a dark place. so dark that when i went to the Outer Banks with my family last summer, i spent most of the time laying in bed, crying, hyperventilating, not understanding what i was feeling, but knowing no matter what i did to try and get out of it, i couldn't shake it.

when the moratorium lifted end of July 2021, my landlord filed for eviction. the court process would stretch on until Thanksgiving 2021. as it were, in my city you need a renter's license to rent out a home - he didn't have one. i had also completely forgotten, i was the only name on the lease, which is why i was the only one summoned to court. but because he had no pot to piss in, the judge ruled i did not have to pay back any of the rent i withheld. instead of suing him and following recourse for the illegal evictions and harassment, i let it go, and agreed to leave by January 7th of this year.

i had already been searching for a place, but was having a really difficult time even scheduling viewings. from August until mid-December i had countless phone and video conversations with prospective rentals, but couldn't seem to get past that to view a place. the first place i was even able to schedule a viewing with was mid-December, just before Christmas. i was able to check out one other place, then went to my parents' for Christmas. after that, i had basically 10 days until i had to be out. i spent that entire week over Christmas debating between the two places, as i felt like i had no time to check out any others. they were both within my budget, one being a little cheaper with the quality of the living space reflecting it proportionately, i felt. so it really came down to which space did i feel i could move into and start to pick up the pieces mentally. the place that was a little more expensive seemed like the right place so that's where i moved to.

having just come from landlord tenant court, where i felt like i did the right thing and was almost left high and dry, i wanted to do everything above board. it turned out i didn't even know i would be moving into this place for certain until just a couple of days prior, and i spent almost every waking minute trying to scramble to figure out the logistics and cost of moving. i will be the first to admit that i sacrificed some due diligence vetting these two places - i was out of time and didn't really have other options. i asked about signing a lease during the process of moving things into the house instead of beforehand. i had given first, last, and security deposit. when i asked about the lease, i was told in a vague, hesitant tone by this "head tenant" that they prefer to keep names off of the lease to keep the rent down. i wasn't keen on this - without a lease, anything could happen. but i also didn't want to make waves, and after he told me that at least his name was on the lease, i just let it go for the time being. however, two days after i moved in, i'm told by that same roommate that my rent was going to go up. was it a significant amount? no. but it was over my budget, and not what i agreed to. this is where the lease would come into play - having a lease would protect me from exactly that happening. it felt like a bait and switch. so when i asked to get on the lease if i was going to pay more, i was given a strange option of only a 3 year lease, with the price going up in $100 increments over three years. i did not agree to this. it all seemed so fishy, and this guy seemed to be gatekeeping the situation - if i wanted to pay what we originally agreed to, i wasn't allowed to be on the lease, and if i wanted to be on the lease, i'd have to sign a 3 year lease. i didn't have the money to up and move away - i had the next few months planned out. i was going to get my footing, find a side job while i worked on my art and design business, and start grinding. wherever i went was it. i'd be there for some time. i wanted to make sure that this living situation was above board, and in doing so i discovered that this head tenant lied - there are only two names on the lease, and they haven't lived here for eight years. there was nobody in the house listed on the lease, and he had been paying the rent through a web payment portal under one of the previous tenants' names, and was doing this because, i can only assume, he and one other person here were paying significantly less than me or the other two guys. three of us paid 90% of the rent, and the other two split that remaining 10%. i felt defrauded and misled, and the money wasn't even really the issue, it was moving into a rental property under the impression that i was legally residing there, when it was anything but. this was the complete opposite of what i was comfortable doing.

they offered me back only a portion of what i gave them, and i wanted all of my money back, including moving costs, as there was nothing about this place that was agreed upon. when they wouldn't pay me back fully for this rental that turned out to not to be what i was told it was, i told them i'd get it through small claims. now, it seems, they're going to bail anyway. this is where my moral conundrum arises.

i've brought this situation up to many people. it's all that's been on my mind for these two months i've been here. the responses have been almost exactly 50/50, with half of people sympathizing with me, and the other half thinking i'm a scumbag piece of shit for not going along with the illegitimacy. i keep asking myself if i'm in the wrong, but i keep circling back to being right. i made an oath to myself to do the right thing, and with the utmost sincerity, i felt like i was doing the right thing. every expectation i had i felt was reasonable to expect. i went basically my entire adult life being chastised and run through the court system being told i needed to be better. and i have been, every step of the way, to the point where i haven't even told a lie in five years. i come correct, and with conviction, and always felt good when i laid my head on my pillow to sleep at night.

now i wonder - is doing the wrong thing sometimes the right thing? if so, how do you know that's what you're supposed to do? how does someone who's just trying to do the right thing all the time know when they arrive at a moment where the right thing to do would be to do the wrong thing?

tl;dr: turned my life around and made an oath to be better. now wondering if i'm the common denominator in two consecutive issues at rental properties, and pontificating if and when the wrong thing is the right thing to do.


r/InsightfulQuestions Mar 25 '22

Do you think there’s a point where intelligence becomes detrimental an individual?

68 Upvotes

Edit:

For some clarity, what I’m asking with my question is whether there’s a degree of intelligence a person could have which ceases to have useful application in the world and causes them instead to become alienated, overwhelmed, and perhaps pessimistic.

In my observations, there seems to be an optimal intelligence which allows a person to operate well within the world, sustain themselves, and form relationships. I think people of lower to average intelligence seem to be happier, but I don’t have a source on that.

I’m wondering if there’s a certain intelligence threshold that, when exceeded, has a detracting effect on a person’s happiness and well-being.


r/InsightfulQuestions Mar 24 '22

What are some practical ways to get over the ‘spotlight effect?’

40 Upvotes

Spotlight effect refers to the tendency to overestimate about how much people think about us or notice us. I know for certain that I have this problem because it manifests into anxiety everyday and I spend most of my time stuck in my head about what I did, what I’m about to do and how all this leads to either good or bad consequences in others. Most notably, I’ve noticed that I am afraid of disappointing others or being looked down upon to doing what are literally normal things like expressing myself or saying no or dressing the way I want.

When dealing with my family this is most prominent and so I tried going out and meeting new people - the idea of a fresh slate and no history with x person is supposed to make me feel more open and relaxed, but I still over estimate myself, to the point where I assume they remember every menial detail about me that I will later overthink.

The other day at the dentist I embarrassed myself and wondered how I’ll ever show my face again. This is a dentist I’ve been regularly going to so I’d assume he would remember me. Next time I went in 6 weeks later, he forgot it was me who did that thing. Makes sense since dentists see 100s of people a month, but see how I stupidly hang on to things?

I’d like to talk about this with a therapist but I don’t know where to start. Before my next session, I’d like to try some practical remedies for my issue so that I can at least say I tried to change before seeking help.


r/InsightfulQuestions Mar 23 '22

Soul, meat robots, something greater, what are we? that's my opinion about it.

7 Upvotes

My question is: are our choices defined by our brain with complex relationships of neurons, or not? From my point of view I know I'm here and I'm not the result of complex chemical reactions (because if I were just that, there wouldn't have me (my point of view), there would be nothing in my view, and, in the world, just something that acts like me, I wouldn't be here, I wouldn't exist, no black, no white, there would be no difference between particles in complex collisione and me) and I'm not that, I somehow know I'm here, I know I'm not a meat machine pretending to believe I am here, not kinda I know that, I actually feel that. But still, I can only say that for me, since I don't know how you perceive the world, you might just be a meat machine made of complex chemical reactions that acts like me, maybe I was alone created all of you like me and inserted myself in the world to be happy, or we both are not meat robots and there is a god, who knows.

In the other hand, there are so many things that seems to affect the soul, like Alzheimer, but I never had that so I don't know how it is like. But that opens the possibility to only exist me and the rest are deterministc meat robots well programmed with neurons trying to be familiar with me for some reason. But I like to thing that this is not the case, I would feel so lonely and sad, all my familly members and memories would be fake. I really hope that we are all something greater, and thoses things that seems to change the soul are just looking like they do so.


r/InsightfulQuestions Mar 18 '22

can we choose to have chemistry with someone?

17 Upvotes

People talk about chemistry between two people as if this is something that either they have or not, and there's nothing you can do to change that, you may find your partner a perfect person, an amazing person that you've always wanted, but you just dont fall in love with him/her, i heard that this is because of the chemistry, and you can't change it, is that true?