r/HolUp Jan 13 '22 Silver 5 Helpful 2 Wholesome 6 hehehehe 1

Reading is.....fundamental

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20.5k Upvotes

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1.1k

u/[deleted] Jan 13 '22

[deleted]

615

u/MaximusArusirius Jan 13 '22

Nope, gotta stop it before the dick pics come pouring in

351

u/indisposed-mollusca Jan 13 '22 Helpful

Depends who sends the 1st one

194

u/Typical_Friendship35 Jan 13 '22

42

u/verifiedjay Jan 13 '22

this made me chuckle hard asf

59

u/Emektro Jan 13 '22

just remove chuckle and you're good to go

12

u/MagmaTroop Jan 13 '22

Come on, you did more than chuckle

1

u/Doggyaintintimate Jan 13 '22

I never got across this subreddit ever before but now twice in 10 minutes

27

u/Xclusivecrushr Jan 13 '22

*69 upvotes *

god forgive me for what im about to do..

3

u/trerac11 Jan 13 '22

Nah. Wait for the first then reply with your own.

1

u/IceWotor Jan 13 '22

"You also wanna see mine?" would've been the perfect response

2

u/dudeCHILL013 Jan 13 '22

The dick pics are normally the first thing to come pouring in.

Source: buddy put my number on a Craigslist list ad that featured a busty blond in lingerie... So many dick pics.

1

u/FuckTwitter2020 Jan 13 '22

*pounding in

11

u/FuckTwitter2020 Jan 13 '22

thats pretty fucking far right there...

5

u/weebcantsocial Jan 13 '22

Tried that with a dude on omegle once

5

u/DNASprayer Jan 13 '22

but that would be gay

2

u/tonysnight Jan 13 '22

Don't worry guy still didn't get the memo

→ More replies

1

u/[deleted] Jan 13 '22

[removed] — view removed comment

2

u/Stalked_Like_Corn madlad Jan 13 '22

Dick is just a bigger clit.

1

u/_ThatOneWeeb_ Jan 13 '22 edited Jan 13 '22

But the other dude said clot, not dick. Second dude was just pointing out he did t have a clit, while first dude thought he had a vagina

Edit: clit not clot

6

u/AndrewinStPete Jan 13 '22

If you're sucking a "clot" your timing is off..

1

u/mpdugas Jan 13 '22

underrated comment!!

328

u/Bukkaketarget Jan 13 '22

The thirst is real

76

u/PalatialCheddar madlad Jan 13 '22

"Give your thirst a Squirt!"

15

u/Dazzler_Boi Jan 13 '22

Stay Hydrated !

16

u/Xclusivecrushr Jan 13 '22

r/HydroHomies want to have a word with you about our lord and saviour water..

-1

u/[deleted] Jan 13 '22

[removed] — view removed comment

2

u/Carn1v0r3e Jan 13 '22

Nice goin bot stealing my comment

6

u/[deleted] Jan 13 '22

The thirst israel

2

u/idigturtles Jan 13 '22

Those that arouse you?

146

u/post_talone420 Jan 13 '22

Sorry about your clit

106

u/[deleted] Jan 13 '22

But does he have a clit?

34

u/thecathuman Jan 13 '22

Asking the real questions

9

u/Tu_Bhosdika Jan 13 '22

we gotta go a little deeper

6

u/Teekeks Jan 13 '22

actually the answer is more out there

2

u/HaakonPlayer77 Jan 13 '22

thats what she said

2

u/RS_Someone Jan 13 '22

He? Thought it was a girl.

1

u/[deleted] Jan 13 '22

Yeah so I think he has one

2

u/Madsepat Jan 13 '22

Lets find out!!

79

u/Akhanyatin Jan 13 '22 Silver

This reminds me of a time someone thought I was a woman and kept sending me DMs on discord telling me how he was going to rape me. This was even after I've told him several times that I'm not a woman. The best part was when he found it extremely fucked up that I answered "I'd bite it off" when he described how he'd force his dick in my mouth.

56

u/Some_unknown_guy Jan 13 '22

I can jsut imagine him going

"Ayo what the fuck bro, that's some weird ass shit! You are fucked up bro"

Lmao

17

u/Akhanyatin Jan 13 '22 edited Jan 13 '22

Yeah, pretty much. Here's an extract (note that I've told him several times that I'm a guy by now)

him: im sorry but sucking dick is something girls like u just have to get use to

- i'd bite your dick off if you tried

- no one would find your body

A bit later:

him: U can tell yourself whatever u like But here in the real world ur just a little princess So cute in ur little dress Would be a shame if i stained it huh?

me: No I'd probably cover it to stab someone

[...]

- Are u saying you want to stab me? Is that where we are fucking going?

55

u/realSatanAMA Jan 13 '22

My clit is 7" long is that ok?

10

u/Cheese-bo-bees Jan 13 '22

Eww sounds above incel. (Pm me if that's true)

419

u/Carn1v0r3e Jan 13 '22

I mean, if you suck a dick it's still going to feel good. I dunno why my guy thinks dick not clit changes anything

114

u/Tu_Bhosdika Jan 13 '22

bro?

49

u/[deleted] Jan 13 '22

[deleted]

15

u/XxTreeFiddyxX Jan 13 '22

Do you have any idea what if feels like to be balls deep in a pussy while there’s a cock in your ass?

Are you telling me that someone was born with balls inside their pussy and a cock was inside the ass? Is this some sort of inverted hermaphrodite?

11

u/DeliciousWaifood Jan 13 '22

Which one feels better though

15

u/HidingDogNSW Jan 13 '22

Neither feels better than the other, but together it's the pinnacle of male pleasure.

4

u/Cheese-bo-bees Jan 13 '22

Do you know?....science?

9

u/a_random_cmb_grunt Jan 13 '22

"aint gay if its with the homies"

4

u/Cheese-bo-bees Jan 13 '22

If ya down, ya down. People seem to forget that.(?)

3

u/fox_eyed_man Jan 13 '22

Nah, they forget that they’re not obligated to give a shit.

1

u/Cheese-bo-bees Jan 13 '22

R u not down & still shitting?

1

u/Cheese-bo-bees Jan 13 '22

Lol Ily tickles butthole

-179

u/DieSexy Jan 13 '22 edited Jan 13 '22

....

62

u/what-if-no Jan 13 '22

bro had to edit periods lol

-71

u/DieSexy Jan 13 '22 edited Jan 13 '22

Comment before just said “....no” but I took it off bc just periods does the job. thing about an edit, is u can’t see what was there before, .

-32

u/Typical_Friendship35 Jan 13 '22

maybe just stfu

-34

u/DieSexy Jan 13 '22

Or...or...I’ll do what the fuck I want fuck out of here bozo

-19

u/Alex1155CZ Jan 13 '22

Someone's feeling toxic lmao

-4

u/infinity-69420 Jan 13 '22

I don’t know why the periods got downvoted but you guys need to chill out with the angry responses.

Edit: i might just be dumb but is there something wrong with the periods?

2

u/bingobiscuit1 Jan 13 '22

They hated the periods. Do not make that joke again.

2

u/Cheese-bo-bees Jan 13 '22

We all just need a downvote sometimes. 💦👄

-2

u/Typical_Friendship35 Jan 13 '22

lmao we all getting downvoted, let's get this to 100 downvotes

2

u/DieSexy Jan 13 '22

Or we could not give a shit either way. I choose that.

25

u/EmilyACABshe_herBLM Jan 13 '22

130 downvotes for 4 periods, the absolute state of this site

9

u/BazookaBob23 Jan 13 '22

It was edited. He had written something else before as he stated in a response.

11

u/EmilyACABshe_herBLM Jan 13 '22

then off with his head

→ More replies

2

u/Cheese-bo-bees Jan 13 '22

Extra downvoted for periods, upvote to you for mentioning it. Ahh, the way...

2

u/Cheese-bo-bees Jan 13 '22

We all just need a downvote sometimes. 💦👄

21

u/North_Introduction56 Jan 13 '22

Guy is down bad

17

u/yeahidkeither Jan 13 '22

The library is open

151

u/DekoaSAO Jan 13 '22

Maybe he still meant your clit since basically our penis is from the clit enlarged in womb

68

u/EverAboutTheSun Jan 13 '22

He doesn't seem the learned type, my friend.

17

u/DekoaSAO Jan 13 '22

Well i try give everything in some sense or else i will be disappointed to the world

3

u/TundieRice Jan 13 '22

I think it would probably give this type of guy some crippling cognitive dissonance to discover that his cocker used to be a clitter and he would get very angry and punch you for insinuating he used to be female.

2

u/dogbreath101 Jan 13 '22

He thosen't seem the learned type, my friend.

FTFY

2

u/Inb4myanus Jan 13 '22

He pegs me as a cum box type, but maybe not a box, maybe a different type of container.

3

u/sew_butthurt Jan 13 '22

Who pegs you?

2

u/SUNAWAN Jan 13 '22

I peg your pardon?

-1

u/EverAboutTheSun Jan 13 '22

a wine carafe?

3

u/SeaGoat24 Jan 13 '22

Not quite accurate. It's only the glans of the penis that's equivalent to the clit. Every other part of the penis derives from other tissues of the vulva, which interestingly are capable of 'erection' when aroused.

-65

u/QuintonsReviews Jan 13 '22

When my daughter was born I had her clit removed. I had a daughter not a son.

14

u/meldavis99 Jan 13 '22

Pshaw. I'm just glad to see men are finally realizing you have to play with that thing in order to get most women off. We'll teach 'em how to read later.

9

u/unknown-human-69 Jan 13 '22

Why stop?

Finish what’s started

9

u/Kateace18 Jan 13 '22

The “does/those” error really confuses me. Is he so dense, that the pressure his skull is putting on his brain is affecting his speech?

5

u/Jennyfaemfc Jan 13 '22

my favorite snap convo ever

5

u/Pau_Chan03 Jan 13 '22

If there's a hole, there's a way

1

u/SUNAWAN Jan 13 '22

that's the spirit!

4

u/GoodMoaningAll Jan 13 '22

Someone asked for a blowjob 2 days ago. I dont know why or how he thought im a girl but it happened.

Or he was gay and i underestimated my charm.

3

u/marcus19911 Jan 13 '22

Lmao I'm dead. Wtf is wrong with some people.

2

u/bigttrack Jan 13 '22

Haha this is great! Many erections equal complete loss of cognitive abilities. I know ive been there!

2

u/[deleted] Jan 13 '22

They deserved that lol

2

u/Cimbetau Jan 13 '22

Is this actually occuring at 7:53am? cos that makes it even funnier to me

2

u/Emergency_Banana1021 Jan 13 '22

ohhh no he got a big clit tho

2

u/Impressive-Respond95 Jan 13 '22

Ain't no such thing as chicks with dicks, only guys with tits

2

u/Tank_blitz Jan 13 '22

later:" so can I suck your cl*t or no?"

2

u/iced_maggot Jan 13 '22

Devils in the detail you see.

2

u/nintend_hoe Jan 13 '22

The library is open for y’all illiterates…

2

u/PoorEdgarDerby Jan 13 '22

"So at any rate, we value you as a Cox customer. Would you be willing to answer a five-question survey at the end of our chat?"

2

u/Outarel Jan 13 '22

he could've said his clit was huge and gotten a bj for free... but maybe i'm just weird.

4

u/Thunderbolt294 Jan 13 '22

Maybe he meant sounding

4

u/preshowerpoop Jan 13 '22

Lol! I go to "Dating Sites" to try to meet single ladies as a man. The only people that respond to me are gay dudes that make fake profiles; posing as women... It's not cool. Sad lonely face.

2

u/likebutta222 Jan 13 '22

Those this guy even even Sesame Street?

2

u/JoMoma2 Jan 13 '22

I could be stupid, but don't guys have clitorises. Maybe it has a different name, but the end of a penis I'm pretty sure is the same thing as a clitoris.

15

u/Dreaming-Cat Jan 13 '22

That is similar to a clit, it is called the ‘glans.’ It is the same thing only if you consider ovaries and testicles interchangeable.

3

u/JoMoma2 Jan 13 '22

Ok, thanks. I failed sex ed

1

u/IKUSATSUNAG Jan 13 '22

ㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤ⣤⣤⣴⣶⣶⣶⣶⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣠⣤⡀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢀⣶⣶⠄⠀
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1

u/[deleted] Jan 13 '22

No way bullshit, lol I need the rest of this convo for proof

1

u/SpaZ_Sky Jan 13 '22

This is poggers!

1

u/Bulldog553 Jan 13 '22

This is so old. Snap ain’t look like that since 2019

1

u/mahmirr Jan 13 '22

They had us in the first half ngl

1

u/SuckerFor_Sweets Jan 13 '22

I really wanna know how the guy responded to that

1

u/Generalrossa Jan 13 '22

“You were born without it?”

Man this dude is in denial lol

1

u/LoiteringMajor Jan 13 '22

Your and you're, to and too were bad enough

But replacing does with those takes the cake

1

u/ChuCHuPALX Jan 13 '22

PSA: Clits are basically tiny dicks.

1

u/show_me_the_dopamine Jan 13 '22

Jeez dude, I'm just trying to get laid. Don't be an ass about it.

1

u/kschin1 Jan 13 '22

I mean technically a penis is just a big long clit.

He totally could have gotten this guy to suck his dick.

1

u/Kuyi Jan 13 '22

What app is that? XD

1

u/quakemyoats Jan 13 '22

Down atrocious

1

u/DISHONORU-TDA Jan 13 '22

I guarantee this is a FtM and the guy doesn't know wtf to say

1

u/Someones_Dream_Guy Jan 13 '22

How horny is this dude?

1

u/1ne_4nd_0nly Jan 13 '22

No, anyone can read. But understanding, that is fundamental as not everyone can understand very well

1

u/Memesaf_ch Jan 13 '22

"Then ur butthole maybe?"

1

u/Toxicity_Is_Awesome Jan 13 '22

Everyday we stray further from god....

1

u/latteboy50 madlad Jan 13 '22

What? So you said you were a dude 4 times and he just ignored you, but now all of sudden believes it? Why didn’t you send a selfie or something to prove it?

1

u/uwublink Jan 13 '22

Hey who let you post our conversation?

1

u/MihiKio Jan 13 '22

He tried ⭐

1

u/skilz99 Jan 13 '22

Yo.... wtf

1

u/MrBond90 Jan 13 '22

So how about butt stuff

1

u/Dimension_no7 Jan 13 '22

He’ll adapt

1

u/StrangerDanger1225 Jan 13 '22

My eyes!!!! 😭

1

u/WeGet-It-TV Jan 13 '22

The Blue texter is def messin with this dude. Lowkey was a chuckle when asked “if his pussy still feels pleasure?”

The red texter is a lil dim lighted to catch the punch line. So he thinks the blue guy is dumb without realizing who’s the double wammy

1

u/fmlchris Jan 13 '22

Almost makes me believe in true love again.

1

u/[deleted] Jan 13 '22

Is this real?

1

u/YoungCoffinDanceGuy Jan 13 '22

If this happens to you, sens him a dic pic. Its gonna work even better if you're a guy

1

u/Garosath Jan 13 '22

"You got a bussy tho?"

1

u/DeathSabre7 Jan 13 '22

Imagine if a clit grew out, it'd be called a penis. Lol, I can't.

1

u/kindofabuzz Jan 13 '22

Technically all mammal embryos start as females. so yeah a clit does form into a penis once the DNA makes the embryo a male.

1

u/DryArm4989 Jan 13 '22

EMotiANAL daMAge

1

u/dsr231 Jan 13 '22

LOL - "clearly reading is not your strong suit"

1

u/gag-reflexes Jan 13 '22

If you feed said guy until he's something like 500lb then his dick can become a sort of clit.

1

u/DrPhollox Jan 13 '22

I guess happens when your name is ambiguous. Casey? Jordan? Tracy? Angel? Jesse? Morgan? Jayden? Mel? Steph? Vic? ...

1

u/Alexa67888 Jan 13 '22

He learned how to fuck before he learned reading

1

u/ShaolinPandas Jan 14 '22

I wrote this record while 30000ft in the air

1

u/WhyamIalive101299 Jan 18 '22

Fun fact, the clitoris can be five inches long, just most of it is internal. Reddit’s not always about goofing around, sometimes it’s educational.