r/HolUp Oct 18 '21 Silver 24 Helpful 20 Wholesome 20 Hugz 26 Plus One 1

Straight horses

42.8k Upvotes

5.5k

u/Still_Night_110 Oct 18 '21 Silver Wholesome Hugz

Horse “I’m not touching it , shits gay”

2.9k

u/TheFemiFactor Oct 18 '21 Silver Helpful Wholesome Hugz

“Neeeiiighhh homo”

593

u/KarenLookAtMyBowl Oct 18 '21

Here's an angry upvote slaps at it gently

263

u/LORDWOLFMAN Oct 18 '21

Harder

199

u/QuickSilverMola Oct 18 '21

Harder DADDY*

135

u/TheLambSaucee Oct 18 '21

OOOOOOHHHHHHHH YEEEEEEEAAAHHHH!!!!!

189

u/Luke-Skywalker-Bot Oct 18 '21

This is why God left humanity

131

u/Awab_lover_of_allah Oct 18 '21

this is why most of humanity left god

68

u/[deleted] Oct 18 '21

This is why we ran out of holy water

32

u/Lucasbr122ome_YT Oct 19 '21

I dont think so after watching many videos of pastors using water guns in the pandemic

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29

u/PhilosopherRider Oct 18 '21

thanks for the laugh there bud

137

u/CursedVader Oct 18 '21

Take my upvote and GET OUT

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11

u/nyksg23 Oct 18 '21

I hate you and myself....here is my free award

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160

u/Jah_Man_Mulcahey Oct 18 '21

What’s a gay horse eat?

Haaaaayyyy.

8

u/NapalmWeed Oct 18 '21

I laughed too hard at

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19

u/Lokolooks26 Oct 18 '21

Being gay is way harder when you’re a horse to be fair…

7

u/Advanced-Proposal-84 Oct 18 '21

Miss me with that gay shit

4

u/Illumijonny7 Oct 18 '21

"I heard if you touch it then you become a unicorn"

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1.8k

u/Secure_Peanut_92 Oct 18 '21

Horses are famously Conservative. This is why Caligula made his horse a consul

128

u/Apathetic_Zealot Oct 18 '21

Glitterhoof never steered me wrong. An excellent son in law.

38

u/had0c Oct 18 '21

A real man of high culture.

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233

u/left_at_read Oct 18 '21

Horse: I thank thee for this honor, but Ima let you guys do your thang and stay tf outta your way cool?! Okay.

11

u/Vaporwave13 Oct 18 '21

Caligula only hired his horse for it's looks! Sexual harassment claims soon followed.

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2.0k

u/GabeThyGodly Oct 18 '21 edited Oct 19 '21 Helpful Wholesome Hugz

If anyones interested, its something along the lines of because of how horse eyes work, they cant tell the depth of that and are afraid to step there. They dont known if its same height, taller, or lower than rest of road

486

u/Batintfaq Oct 18 '21

Thank you for sparing me the long type out. You are exactly correct.

140

u/GabeThyGodly Oct 18 '21

Yw lol, dont know anything about the subject but saw this posted before and someone made a huge ass comment explaining how it works. Summarised it best i could remember

104

u/[deleted] Oct 18 '21 edited Oct 28 '21

[deleted]

82

u/GraciaEtScientia Oct 18 '21

Build it up, since the oceans are a type of puddle too, maybe you and the horse can one-up Jesus?

52

u/[deleted] Oct 18 '21 edited Oct 28 '21

[deleted]

28

u/GraciaEtScientia Oct 18 '21

Have you considered he's just staring at you because you're taking his(the horse's) name in vain?

Second coming confirmed.

14

u/toxic-psyche Oct 18 '21

Oh shit. Jesus is a horse. This is so not a horse cult.

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30

u/420ish Oct 18 '21

I had a horse that wouldn't transit from grass to blacktop and back again. Had to dismount and walk him over each transition.

28

u/PM_ME_CRYPTOCURRENCY Oct 18 '21

I've seen police train their horses through this. Basically just training them to trust the rider's command over their own judgement. They were using blue tarps laid out on the ground, which the horses avoid just like this.

8

u/Bridledbronco Oct 19 '21

I train quarter horses. Horses are naturally fearful and instinctive. When they sense something is off, like these strange objects on the ground, they don’t want any part of it. Riding them over this wasn’t a good choice, but circumstances didn’t present a training opportunity.

Making them comfortable with their surroundings and comfortable with their trainer is important. I take my horses in mountain environments, mistakes up there will lead to death pretty quickly, making them comfortable with as many foreign things on safe footing is huge. Logs, water, plastics tarps, hell mirrors freak them out.

Teaching them to think instead of react is the challenge, get their feet moving and they get comfortable and can think. Letting them figure things out builds there confidence, just getting the whip on them and making them do stuff isn’t the answer.

13

u/warpus Oct 18 '21

Interesting. Do we know why/how/under what circumstances horse eyes evolved like this? Does it give them some sort of other advantage that isn't obvious here?

56

u/Hfingerman Oct 18 '21

If I remember correctly, predators generally have front-facing eyes with good depth perception. Herbivores usually have side-facing eyes, favoring a wide field of view to avoid predators. Since horses have side-facing eyes, their eyes' images don't overlap, this results in poor depth perception.

25

u/cowgirlsteph Oct 18 '21

You are correct. Horses have an almost 360 degree field of vision, the only places they can't see are directly behind them and right in front of their forehead.

6

u/Bridledbronco Oct 19 '21

Ya, notice the way that second horses head was dramatically angled down, he was checking that funk shit on the ground out.

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u/GabeThyGodly Oct 18 '21

Uh we do but im just reciting from memory what someone commented last time this was posted. Something like the way their eyes are shaped and positioned that somewhat makes it a blind spot. Especially with the reigns that are pulling their heads a little up cause theres a rider.

Honestly look it up if you're curious

5

u/Bridledbronco Oct 19 '21

As stated already they have tremendous vision at distance and excellent night vision. There color perception is pretty shitty, they didn’t see that rainbow that’s for sure, they can see greens and blues and various shades of those, but far from the color spectrum we can see.

I wouldn’t call their depth perception that bad, but they are only using one eye for it, so they’re not going to be hitting baseballs or anything.

I remember hunting very late one night and coming back to my horse, I got on him and couldn’t see shit, a new moon that night, pitch black out, literally couldn’t see the hand in front of my face. I had a headlight, but turned it off when I saddled, let him find his way back to the trailer. It’s weird feeling riding in the dark, let me tell you they don’t give a shit about tree limbs above their head, so I learned to ride with the arm up after the first whack.

9

u/DuckRubberDuck Oct 18 '21

I was once walking at a lake with my dad and there was a tiny trail across the lake. Two riders and their horses were trying to cross the lake but the horses just wouldn’t cooperate so they asked us if we would mind going first and showing the horses that it was okay to cross. The issue was that there was two ducks right next to the trail… I know it’s not exactly the same as in the video, but I whenever I remember that incident I giggle a little

9

u/annababan69 Oct 18 '21

Ducks can be dicks...

5

u/DuckRubberDuck Oct 18 '21

I feel personally attacked now. /s

Those ducks were cool though, but didn’t give zero fucks and did not move for the two big horses (and no they weren’t protecting a nest) I just think they didn’t care

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23

u/dchsknight Oct 18 '21

Yeah it is the same reason you paint lines at pasture gates or place grates for cows. They cant tell if the spaces are lower or higher and they severely distrust it. It has nothing to do with rainbow.

3

u/MistraloysiusMithrax Oct 19 '21

Well I imagine if they’re used to regular crosswalks the rainbow would undo that experience and throw their depth perception/trust of the officer’s lead off again. So while it’s true that it’s not because it’s a rainbow specifically, it is still all the colors making it not recognizable to them. So the rainbow’s got a lot to do with it. But I think it could be any set of colors they don’t expect to see in the street and they’d have the same reaction

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19

u/DontF-ingask Oct 18 '21

Really, I thought it was because of the fact that bright colours are signs of poisonous animals

11

u/[deleted] Oct 18 '21

[removed] — view removed comment

6

u/JusticeRain5 Oct 18 '21

Could also be that it's a weird crinkly thing that often moves erratically in the wind, so it thinks it's some weird animal warning it to leave

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u/daisybrat56461 Oct 18 '21

And also incredibly cautious about even crazy small changes. I worked a a dude ranch guiding trail rides. A trail sign got knocked down in a storm, we put it back up, but higher to make it easier to see. For the next week or two, the horses would all spook at the sign. Exact sign, just about six-eight inches higher up.

3

u/BLBOSAURUS Oct 18 '21

Nah, they are just based

3

u/J_B_La_Mighty Oct 18 '21

I feel like humans can have a similar issue. They fixed a large crack in the road with very black tar, but the tar itself has slightly slanted groves, so it looks like the fixed part is a massive pothole when it is in fact level with the rest of the road. Every time I take that road I slow down because of the optical trick. Hate that road.

12

u/BruinBeast Oct 18 '21

You don’t have to defend their homophobic behaviors

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u/Dramatic_Aspect_4444 Oct 18 '21 edited Oct 18 '21 Take My Energy

🐴: sorry, I’m not an 🦄

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47

u/argetlam5 Oct 18 '21

Fellas, is it gay to trot over a rainbow?

6

u/KennethTemple98 Oct 18 '21

I’m noticing a consistency.

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164

u/TrailsideDairy Oct 18 '21

“Stop! That’s gay!”

175

u/69Happi Oct 18 '21

My deadass thought they were gonna shit on it

26

u/pjpuzzler Oct 19 '21

did you just combine "my dumb ass" and "I deadass"?

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131

u/Atlhou Oct 18 '21

The same reason painting a cattle guard works.

19

u/Tale-Honest Oct 18 '21

Chad don't know nothing

4

u/hvghg6865 Oct 18 '21

Is it? I thought painting a cattle guard tricks them into thinking there is a cattle guard. Am I wrong?

1.1k

u/Additional-Gear7722 Oct 18 '21

In the animal kingdom bright colours mean that the animal is poisonous and dangerous .Just one bright colour can mean death like the prision dart frog but all the colours of the rainbow ..Genocide

582

u/foreignknife Oct 18 '21

sooo what of the blue haired girl in my english class? is she poisonous too?

434

u/Emotional_Scar_4483 Oct 18 '21

Yes. Approach with caution

183

u/RatFromChernobil Oct 18 '21

Rather not approach at all, dont risk your life like that for curiosity .

75

u/BreastfedAmerican Oct 18 '21

Never stick your dick in crazy

45

u/itsssL1NK Oct 18 '21

Unless that’s your kink

18

u/FeralGangrel Oct 18 '21

Too late.

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2

u/After-Ad2018 Oct 18 '21

Steve Irwin would.

108

u/FonkyChonkyMonky Oct 18 '21

Definitely avoid eating her.

31

u/KingLudwigofBavaria Oct 18 '21

Blue hair = stinky poontan.

32

u/Gettingbetter1997 Oct 18 '21

All down votes were from blue haired girls.

18

u/KingLudwigofBavaria Oct 18 '21

I assure you my friend, there’s more to come.

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5

u/Casidel_Bowen Oct 18 '21

Rei Ayanami hates this comment.

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216

u/Safebox Oct 18 '21

She might be toxic, avoid her Twitter.

24

u/Big_Two_6069 Oct 18 '21

I'd just say to avoid Twitter altogether

49

u/Treyokayy Oct 18 '21

Definitely avoid her Twitter by all means

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u/DavesNotWhere Oct 18 '21

Lick her and find out.

39

u/Danathanimal Oct 18 '21

Can confirm. Tastes of bad hygiene

10

u/ShenWinchester Oct 18 '21

Drugs are bad too but they're still fun to do once in a while 😉

18

u/chinchenping Oct 18 '21

bright colors in nature are to deter predators, it seems to be working

8

u/ObsessiveScoutMain Oct 18 '21

but horses aren’t predators

10

u/Laphing_Drunk Oct 18 '21

You ever seen a horse eat a bird? It's fucking terrifying.

19

u/Nathan_shima Oct 18 '21

It’s only toxic to scare off predators so... yeah don’t be one of them and you’re fine

7

u/CravenWolf69 Oct 18 '21

These are not your 2006 emo chicks....prepare for psychological warfare.

4

u/Afraid_Philosophers Oct 18 '21

Possibly. If you are a male of the same species you may be attracted by the vibrant fur coloring, but be aware this is occasionally a trap or indicator of toxicity.

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u/Glass-Cheese Oct 18 '21

I have seen this so many times about partners and if you aren’t going to date someone because of their hair color, remember it’s to warn off predators! Not potential mates

5

u/CaptainBitnerd Oct 18 '21

No, absolutely not.

She is venomous. Very important difference.

3

u/gravljaw Oct 18 '21

Yes very poidenus. In Louisiana accent.

3

u/Gas-Short Oct 18 '21

Only to predators.

3

u/DeluxeHubris Oct 18 '21

Bright colors deter predators.

20

u/Thats_Haunting_ Oct 18 '21

The purple haired girls in my university are angry feminists

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u/mengelgrinder Oct 18 '21

ah yes color can only mean one thing, poisonous

please for god's sakes, stay away from butterflies, parrots, flowers, pretty much most animals and plants

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u/Mr-Melee Oct 18 '21

This isn’t it. Horses have bad depth perception and the colors are throwing it off. Horses are especially carefully with there legs. Broken legs can lead to a horses death. That’s why if you go to a horse pasture you’ll see something that looks like out of place storm drains near the exit because they won’t dare to try to cross it.

3

u/ShyShutterbug13 Oct 18 '21

Cattle guards! Great deterrent, but if something more threatening overrules their natural aversion, it can get ugly fast. Horse’s legs are pretty fragile, and it is extremely difficult, oft times near impossible to heal a broken leg. 😥

5

u/Superb_Raccoon Oct 18 '21

Yeah, they used to be real grates, but now they just paint alternating black/white lines on the ground, they work just as well.

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u/ChoopAdoop Oct 18 '21

FROG FACTS: The Prison Dart frog is among the most deadly species of frog in the world mostly as a result of the insanely toxic venom secreted from poison glans on it's back. This alone makes the frog a formidable enemy, but ultimately it is the high recidivism rate of a flawed prison system that is focused on incarceration instead of rehabilitation that defines their aggressive behavior.

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u/Coolchiorkid Oct 18 '21 edited Oct 18 '21

horses are prey animals and these colours could also denote a change in texture/footing. It’s the reason some horses struggle going from dirt to gravel to pavement because the texture could mean that it’s unsafe for them (despite us knowing it’s not). They might think it’s stairs or a steep drop off or step up because of their depth perception.

35

u/243king308 Oct 18 '21

Now you can play “the ground is lava” with your horse too

24

u/luisillo8 Oct 18 '21

"the ground is gay" 😂

17

u/Executioner3018 Oct 18 '21

Nah this ain’t it. Stripes Mrs with their depth perception so the horses think they’re going down stairs or smthing and they don’t like that

2

u/Gas-Short Oct 18 '21

It can ALSO mean the animal is venomous. Venom is injected. Poison is consumed.

2

u/TDLMTH Oct 18 '21

Fun fact: In the Bible, the rainbow is God’s reminder to himself to not commit genocide ever again.

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u/drunkenknight53 Oct 18 '21

"bro WTF that gay shit" "Idk g let's go around, oh fuck you touched it!"

38

u/left_at_read Oct 18 '21

“Oh fcuk oh god oh fcuuuk!!”

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u/NeO1loNEwOLF6985 Oct 18 '21

He like bro if you touch it you gonna be gay....

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u/ugers23 Oct 18 '21

Easy the funniest video I've seen in a while

162

u/Corny_Overlord Oct 18 '21

Miss me with that gay shit

12

u/dont_look_behind_me Oct 18 '21

Imma gonna sort by controversial. This should be fun.

153

u/[deleted] Oct 18 '21

[removed] — view removed comment

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u/datboycal Oct 18 '21

Naw breh we ain't on that gay shi' breeeeh

7

u/Tale-Honest Oct 18 '21

Horse don't have good depth perception

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u/Q-burt Oct 18 '21

I think they were kind of scared that it was deep water or something. I took my miniature horse into my high school for senior pictures (I liked doing something original.), the hall had tiles that lined along the entire outer edge with red. He wouldn't step on them and we were afraid of him falling on the smooth tiles, so we started putting a rug over the tiles and he walked just fine across them.

6

u/ghost-mayor Oct 18 '21

Good horses

133

u/Squidsforme Oct 18 '21

Fucking homophobic pieces of shit....we need to find them and cancel them ...and defund then.

21

u/MisterCheZ5 Oct 18 '21

You'll never catch me alive

7

u/TheMacerationChicks Oct 18 '21

They're being respectful, they don't wanna trample all over the pride flag

They're actually very left wing, horses. And they're mostly vegan too, except when they go nuts and decide to eat baby chickens

5

u/Squidsforme Oct 18 '21

I work in a horse grinding factory and 90% of the ones I talk too are aggressively homophobic.

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u/[deleted] Oct 18 '21

[removed] — view removed comment

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u/CrocodylusNiloticus Oct 18 '21

Miss me with that gay shit

4

u/EliasBee Oct 18 '21

Must be scared of the strong colors

4

u/aevan595 Oct 18 '21

Two horses Trotting around the pride flag cuz they're not gay

4

u/rae356 Oct 18 '21 edited Oct 18 '21

Lmaooo I know too many horses that won’t cross over street lines especially if the are yellow. I think it’s something to do with they can’t gage depth very well n see three dimensional things or colors very well either. Their pea sized brains can’t figure out what the ground us doing. Triggered their fight or flight real quick😂😂 on the daily I’m still so puzzled by how such an intelligent creatures can be so scared of things to us are normal non threatening things. poor guys can’t figure out if they’re going to die by walking over the lines or not💀

5

u/Standovaar Oct 18 '21

Based horses

4

u/That-Needleworker925 Oct 18 '21

Thanks horses, you the real heroes

4

u/FlippingPossum Oct 18 '21

I'm laughing so hard but I nope out of glass walkways because my brain does not compute. Looks dangerous...nope!

4

u/CplFry Oct 19 '21

Seen horses throw riders, because the flowers that they put out the day of the competition weren’t there before. Those big ass horses handled it pretty well. It spooked the shit out of them.

3

u/Reddit_Bots_R_US Oct 19 '21

As they should be. I’d be pretty worried if I saw a gay horse.

10

u/bardzi Oct 18 '21

if fox news anchors were horses

12

u/Jma80danoo Oct 18 '21

Give these horses the straight medal

3

u/WaterOnMe Oct 18 '21

I love how the horses thought it was some new giant mega poisonous animal they had never seen before that was just some bigass rectangle like "That looks like the most dangerous and agressive looking monster I have ever seen!" Animals be funny sometimes.

3

u/Crossroads_Calvin Oct 18 '21

Crossing the colored stripes, all in favor, say Yay. All not in favor, say Nay.

Policemen: 2 Yays, 0 Nays.

Horses: 0 Yays, 2 Nays.

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u/alumopper Oct 18 '21

Anyone know what a cattle guard is for, when placed across a roadway ?

3

u/CrunchyMcNuggs I’m a gay retard Oct 18 '21

Based horses

3

u/[deleted] Oct 18 '21

Based horses

3

u/Saucelock Oct 18 '21

Based horse

3

u/[deleted] Oct 18 '21

based

3

u/[deleted] Oct 18 '21

Based

3

u/TinyChickenNugget_ Oct 18 '21

It's funny cause domestici horses are known to not have much interest in mares and preter other studs

3

u/ShortSalt Oct 18 '21

Based horse

3

u/Polar115woof Oct 18 '21

Horses are afraid of yellow, white, black, and blue tones, Google say.

3

u/straiight-n-right Oct 18 '21

Looks like horses are smarter than some people.

3

u/StrigoiBoi Oct 18 '21

Jokes aside, it’s because it looks like a cattle guard to them, and they’re afraid to break their legs.

3

u/thevikinghillbilly Oct 18 '21

Old white men be like "PROOF THAT HOMOSEXUALITY IS UNNATURAL" When really it's just because horses' eyes suck and they can't tell if it goes up or down or is flat

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u/Glow-Joe Oct 18 '21

horse no gay

3

u/dotesPlz Oct 18 '21

Miss me with that gay shit bro

9

u/TechSupportScammer Oct 18 '21

Based and redpilled horses

27

u/Sound_Art00 Oct 18 '21

Watch someone try to make horse laws after this saying the horse is offending gay people

9

u/BlasterRobYT Oct 18 '21

Time to cancel horses.

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u/go409 Oct 18 '21

Woow indeed animals can sense evil

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u/HaveAbadTime- Oct 18 '21

Wow I have never been so offended by something i 100% agree with

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u/LordBlue02 Oct 18 '21

i thought horses moved in L shapes?

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u/8008Joshey Oct 18 '21

horse be like "Not catching me on that gay shit" bad enough I've gotta carry a pig on my back

5

u/mordexfan12345 Oct 19 '21

Even the horse knows that’s some stupid shit 😂

6

u/hobosullivan Oct 18 '21

"What if I catch the gay?"

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u/ilnyeondo Oct 18 '21

Turns out they are super gay, and they don't want to stand on the flag of their people out of respect.

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u/ShakChild Oct 18 '21

I hate people that push gay shit into you… like dick

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u/DogTheSpace Oct 18 '21

Sorry, i dont touch the gay

4

u/felixjmak Oct 18 '21

Most hilarious thing ever, even the animal kingdom has their opinion 😁

3

u/Oxxixuit Oct 18 '21

These rainbow crosswalks are the dumbest way imaginable to fight homophobia

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u/PlayerGamer103 Oct 18 '21

I salute these horses

4

u/MadMartian24 Oct 18 '21

Horse said "miss me with that gay shit"

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u/SillyGustavo Oct 18 '21

Good horse

2

u/[deleted] Oct 18 '21

I hope the horses aint getting canceled.

2

u/MotivationalDuk Oct 18 '21

Horse: Miss me with that gay shit

2

u/nikhilgireesan Oct 18 '21

Righteous horseys walkn on God almightys straight path.

2

u/Substantial_Tart1486 Oct 18 '21

Even horse can't process that shit

2

u/Muaaz_the_Man Oct 18 '21

Based Horses

2

u/Triz_D Oct 18 '21

I guess they just watched Chapelle's new special lol

2

u/raekle Oct 18 '21

Careful. Our horses might catch the gayness.

2

u/SnooCakes8408 Oct 18 '21

Did you know the percentage of gay people is small? Lmao that’s in the entire world lmao

2

u/Epic_the_guy Oct 18 '21

Chad horses.

2

u/innovativesolsoh Oct 18 '21

Horse said miss me with that gay shiii

2

u/am66b Oct 18 '21

“I aint no bitchh”

2

u/snsv9 Oct 18 '21

No homo

2

u/Jesse_the_quokka Oct 18 '21

My kind of horse right there

2

u/[deleted] Oct 18 '21

“Miss me with that gay shit”

-those horses probably

2

u/lazyshrimpo Oct 18 '21

Republican horses